W Winchester

W Winchester Mar 2016

Imagine reading your favourite book backwards and upside down.
Hearing your favourite song sung by your least favourite artist.
Your least favourite sound turned into an intrusive thought.
Getting tested on knowledge you've never seen before.

Imagine the frustration.

Imagine nails on a chalkboard. Now imagine they're yours.
Someone you love telling you they hate you.
Someone you hate telling you they love you.
Constantly smelling smoke but never seeing fire.

Imagine the frustration.

Now imagine losing your own ****** game.

Hold your breath my dear, we're going under...

#anger #lust #frustration #*** #iamsopissedoff

Mar 2016

Belle Victoria

your bare skin.

never tell your stories, the adventures you lived
to someone who doesn't bother to listen to them

he never wanted to steal my freedom or to make me mad
we were both obsessed with the kind of love me had

I couldn't stop staring at the pictures me made last night
how your heart skipped a beat when I touched your bare skin

it was like reliving all the things we lost in the cold ground of hell
the mermaids were done singing their songs when we met that day

true love was like walking in a forest were no trees were growing
finding my soulmate was like the moon waiting for the sun to rise again

everything was the same and everything was not the same

the little things that I adored about you were kind of fading, gone
it was the way you said my name what made me fell for you back then

but now your voice doesn't sound the same anymore..

#love #freedom #girl #sun #boy #music #stories #mermaids

W Winchester Mar 2016

Party Favours

I remember walking in,
taking a shot
and taking off my clothes

I remember being the first one in the pool.
I remember him asking if I was
"just going to hang out in a wet bikini
for the rest of the night"
I remember telling him yes
and him responding
"I am more than okay with that."

I remember playing never have I ever
and losing within the first five minutes
I remember a group of boys chanting
at me and Emily to "kiss! kiss! kiss! kiss!"

I remember playing beer pong
with ***** instead

I remember checking the time
and not giving a **** about
going home

I remember a baby-faced boy
who'd never been kissed

I remember him asking me "Wanna makeout?"
I remember saying yes, I remember following him
to the tennis courts and taking off my bikini
I remember getting on my knees,
but let's say I don't remember
what happened next

Kind of felt like a fever dream/ I also feel like if you're following me you should know that I've never published a poem about the same man twice.

#*** #parties #sorority #fratparties

W Winchester Mar 2016

oh.

What's that? - he said
You know - I said
Why'd you take them? - he asked
Reasons - I said
He paused
I waited

You don't need them. - he said

Condoms, it's about condoms

#***

Mar 2016

Jay

Another Lonely Camping Trip

I'd love to curl up with you tonight.
Feel you next to me.
Learn the pattern of your breaths.
I'd love to cuddle up in a blanket and watch
the sun dip lazily behind the mountains,
the golden rays reflecting your soul,
the breeze playing with your hair.
I want you to tell me the meaning behind each tattoo
and talk late into the night about life's important things.
I want to fall back, and look at the stars,
and as I look over at you, wonder how you're not up there with them.
Fingers interlocked,
souls dancing under receding moonlight.
Your presence, reflecting the world.

I'll have to dream of you instead,

W Winchester Feb 2016

beautiful tears

I'm just so sad
and full of disappointment

and i don't have the pretty words
or the colourful pain

to paint you a picture
vivid enough to show you

how little i feel
I've been skinned raw enough times

and now i just want a safe place
or to fall into someone's arms

im vulnerable and open
but no one wants that

I'm failing at what I'm good at
because I'm too honest

sorry i don't have beautiful tears
my wounds don't bleed red like a sunset

my skin is not cut like scalpels into clay
my eyes don't hold any secrets

my words won't move you
further than simple acknowledgement

i don't have what it takes
to be gorgeous while I hurt

my sadness isn't pretty
i mostly feel like ****

im dying

#love #depression #sadness #death #tears #happiness #beauty #unhappy

W Winchester Feb 2016

what if

supposedly you can like... reclaim your virginity if you just try it y'know consensually with a clear head then it doesn't matter what happened before because you own it now but

I'm not sure that's how it works

i just want
to start over
i want my virginity back, i want my childhood back, i want my friends back i want control over my life because I've never had that
little things, I guess

Yeah just the small things

well idk big things whatever i just want it all back
id do it again and do it right
id like my innocence back, i want possibilities back, i want hope back
i want the freedom of not having to worry about consequences i want the trust of my mother back i want
whatever

You want your life back

who would i have turned out to be if i wasn't stalked and harassed and sexually abused when i was thirteen until i was sixteen? what if i didn't attempt suicide so many times? what if i didn't **** my childhood pets? what if i succeeded in school? what if I cared about my relationships? what if I wasn't a pathological liar?
yeah I want my life back. but its more than that. i want ME back
because what if

everything italicised is what HE said

#depression #sadness #honesty #if #what #questions #*** #lying #texts #virginity