I can see and sense my new way of being
I can feel and recall the power of seeing
The veil of “my thoughts” have lifted
Something profound in presence shifted

Seeing the world clearly isn’t what you think
The taste of the drink, is just the taste of the drink
There is no craving, fantasy, or filter
The simplicity throws you off kilter

I'll stay here for now to see what's next
Presence is a moment, without context
Uncertainty is now my friend not my foe
I take a step forward, let's see where we go

Anger
I hid you far away
In a cave, black and grey

While you were gone
I lost my will and my song
But I now see you belong

Voices made me hide you
Now I have some fresh advice
Your truth is a fire, not all is nice

You are fierce
The guard of vulnerable and pure
Without you, I refuse to endure

You move worlds
You scream at injustice
You start revolution
You bring my power back
There's more, that's a fact

Please do return
Not to dominate or define
To push me into a life I would sign

The door is open
Let us see, speak, and feel
Possibilities are endless and real

It's time to get honest
Our journey won't be light
More of a dance and a fight
But I choose this as my right
Not forgetting my heart and clear sight

The time has come, let’s meet
Pensively, I approach my seat
Legs cross, arms down, I ground
On earth, origin of life and sound

Pain awaits, through a kingdom of gates
Wall upon wall, separates
The only way to get where I must go
Is to wade and move against the waters flow

I shiver, I shudder, a nasty feeling
The dark road ahead has me reeling
It’s asking me to slowly let go
I cry out, I don’t feel ready for you to show

I fluctuate, in and out, out and in
The first layer of discomfort starts to dim
My stomach is in knots, organs turning
My heart is alight, and softly burning

The energy in my being starts to drain
As I experience the beginnings of my pain
Years and years I’ve lived with no emotion
Now I’m in a landfill of hurt with no potion

The sting begins to penetrate my chest
I lose my will, my speech, this is my quest
I feel a clarity, cold, raw, and pure
A dismissed child, I must know him to cure

In hysterics, I run back to safety
I can't experience your full grace lately

There are too many pits to explore in one day
Right now I’m opting to escape, hide, and play
Until I am ready to touch this truth, so grey
A pain that is near, but also so far away

Awake in the dark
A voice reminds me

Open your presence
Let go of that thought
Close your eyes slow

You are held by me
A universe you can't see

Sometimes I feel like a kid
Running, climbing, playing
Smiling as I climb a new flight of stairs
Looking to my parents when I reach the top
Waiting for eye contact, a clap,
A shimmer of pride in their eye

But i'm an adult
I'm trying, helping, managing
Working to make some kind of mark on the world

As different as these worlds may seem
Both seek a pure thing
We are looking for the world to smile back at us
To say: I see you, I appreciate you, you are here.

I dread your arrival, it’s true
You are cold, you are raw, so blue
You rob me of my heart, my soul
Your talk is not meant to console
Less of this, more of that, lose hope
No clear way to connect or cope

Pause, please hold on and let me speak
Like a friend who cares for you deep
I’m here to connect you to pain
A friend who you passed for your brain
My voice is low, but is the way
I beg you to hear what I say

Stop trying, stop doing, let go
I am your guide, let’s try this flow
It’s time to feel how you feel now
I am here to whisper slow down
The tightness I bring to your chest
A mark for you to seek what’s best

I hear you but I can not wait
You show up when I need to be great
That magical girl, her eyes bright
I want her to see my mind and my might
But here you are again, so bold
Your track is on repeat and old

OK, OK, I’ll see us through
Close your eyes and believe what’s true
You want to love and care for her
Like you have never practiced before
You forget who you are in pursuit of this door
So pause, breathe, and connect to the floor

Stop shaping your words, dulling truth
She wants your all, not needing proof
Show her your world, not what she wants
Your care, your truth, even what haunts
The vision of the world you could share
Your soft touch, gentle words, heart bare

You are on the ledge, the risk is high
But be yourself till the day you die
The measure of a man is his heart
It conquers fear, evil, that’s just a start

You call me anxious, but I’m your friend
You won’t forget this when we meet again