There's monsters in my closet,

They came to say hello

They want to take me someplace

But I don't want to go.

but I will miss
writing
in the afterlife.

it was the only way
I could slice open my veins
and bleed out my words
without making a mess.

1 became 10
And 10 became 20
Then 20 slowly grew to 100
They multiplied until they consumed not only my flesh
But my soul

As the weather changes
I begin to start anew
I have become so much greater
There are things that I still have
Left from the old
But they are now mixed with the new

I have moved on
You are no longer my greatest desire
You stopped trying
So I did the same
In the end it will be better
But for now,
I still feel a twinge in my heart
When our eyes meet

I have found something new
Something wonderful
Though it could never be quite the same
It will be close
My heart can still be filled.

Not with the gold of your hair
Or the cheer of optimism
But by the dark black of a midnight rose
That will only bloom for me.
One without thorns that will stab me
When all I want to do is hold you.

The petals will not wither
Or fall like tears upon my cheek
To be blown away
And leave forever.

She will be different
She will care
She will not leave me in pain
She will not break my heart and soul
To leave me with nothing.

Inhale.
The icy air cuts your throat
Like shards of a shattered past
The incisions sting you
Like the remembrance of her
The mere thought pains you
As they rush through
Like a train,
Leaving nothing behind.

Exhale.
Your breath leaves a cloud
You hope it begins to storm
Like the thundering emotions
Rumbling though your soul
Your breath leaves you empty
With nothing left
Just like she did.

Inhale.
You begin feeling sick
Her perfume is like poison
Its intoxicating scent
Seeps into your blood
Leaving you wanting more
That you will never receive .

Exhale.
You are seeing more than stars
The lights are spinning
You feel faint
Her look has you dazed
And you fall for her.
Hard.

Inhale.
As she walks past you
And out of your life forever
Then you are overcome with sadness
From the thought of what might've been.

Exhale.
For the last time.
As the rope tightens around your neck
And you kick the chair over
And fall again, for her
With a sickening snap
All because of her.

A caterpillar,
this deep in fall--
    still not a butterfly.

You lie next me
I smell your scent
You drift into sleep
I watch you breathe slow and deep
You mumble words that I strain to hear
I lean closer, feel your body's heat
You drape an arm over me
I start to drift away on the sleepy tide
You mumble once more
I hear the words now
You say her name, you nuzzle my hair
I fade into the darkness of sleep
I fade into obscurity by your side
You've forgotten me.