Your lies were dipped in bittersweet chocolate;
with a heaping amount of caramel sauce drizzled on top.
I gobbled up more than I care to openly admit;
in fear of what others will think and say.
After enjoying your momentary treats;
came the truth;
with so much salt, it was baffling to eat.
The lies I ate, but
the truth I couldn’t take.
Oh, you have... scars?*
Your words are drenched in disgust.
But don't let what you see deceive you,
you can't guess the stories I don't tell.
And you can't know if you don't ask.
You should know better than that by now;
my scars are not what you'd expect.
And neither am I.
For someone who thinks seeing me without clothes means seeing me naked and bare.
I am from Eastern Europe.
Brownstone and Komet
Jacobson and Kramer.
The blood in these veins
is the blood from the
Those lucky enough to escape.
I was created through a series of
genetics and discrepancies
that lay upon my
Scars on my chest
yellowish skin that needed light
From brown hair brown eyes
From the pretense of
being first in line
To being stubborn
in all the wrong ways.
I am from Neverland
leader of the Lost Boys
I prefer a knife to a sword,
and a sword to a gun.
Though I abhor violence.
I am from oblivion, coming back
because I didn’t want
to go alone.
I am guided by a spirit
One who stands beside me,
through it all.
Twin soul to an angel,
fear of the dark.
I am from countless brave
people their blood is in
I am from a snowstorm
and a sunless day
but still bright enough to see in.
I am from love and hate,
Shame and pride.
I am from magic and life.
I am from nowhere and
I am from
This blood in my veins.
I thought I'd killed you
Haven't you done enough
Haven't you caused me to suffer enough?
I sliced my wrist for you
drew lines of blood across my chest
There will be faint scars that I will always
see as red
Because of you.
I collapsed the world for you.
Almost died for you.
For fifteen years I smothered myself
So that you could live.
And then I killed you.
Sick as I was for having inhibitions on my happiness
just for you to survive
I said goodbye in the rain
Staring into the trees made out through the mist
You were gone
I made sure you were gone.
But here you are
back again to cause me pain.
Guised in the cloak of being a friend
You smile so kindly
but I know better.
I am not the girl you thought I was,
The girl you made me be.
I hate you!
I ******* hate you.
But I also love
I love you
You are a part of me.
Us in our duality
I wouldn't be here if not for you.
You wouldn't be here if not for me.
For having to support me
In the world gone mad
I still hate you
hate that the pain I suffered under your hands
is what brought me here.
Here at the crossroads where I must choose.
I hate you
But I love you
******* I love you.
You are a part of me
A crucial necessity of my identity.
I cannot survive without you
without the memories of you.
The memories of us.
All the times we flew
All the times we fell.
I know which path I must choose
The one to travel on without you.
But before we go
Our separate ways
know that I love you
that I won't forget you
Even in time as the voice we shared
Deepens into my own
Even when I remove the tissue
you grew on my chest
I won’t forget you.
You are a part of me
I love you
You are me
But I am no longer a part of
I read a obituary in the newspaper.
Of a long lost friend.
It hit me off the page.
Like an arrow through my heart.
Keith Wilson. Windermere. UK. 2016.
We went everywhere
and got nowhere,
life goes on.
I explain my metaphors with metaphors
I don't know how else to express
My thoughts that sit in clutter drawers
And leave my mind a mess
If you don't understand my comparison
I'll just say it in a different way
My thoughts still shielded by a garrison
Suppressing things I need to say
You hurt me like you get paid to do so,
Like its the only thing you are good at, and you don't want to let go,
But hurt me more,
Because by now I know,
That its the only way to keep you with me
I am the moth that found love in the grip of fire,
Even if its for the shortest period of time,
I will be that extra spark in your light
When you are tired and dying,
When your beauty is flickering and fading,
When you are sad and lonely
And when you learn what love means,
I know you will remember me,
The lunatic who loved you endlessly
For this love will not die with my body
It will stay
In everything that makes you feel special in every way,
In the poems you could not throw away, because you knew they could not have been written for anyone else,
In the spaces that did not demand you to change
In everything that makes you, you
I will be there