(i) I get to see you almost everyday. And as much as I hate seeing you, I know deep down that I keep searching for you in a room full of people.
(ii) your memory lingers: with every place that we had been, with every food I knew you love, with every word I used to hear you say, with every wink that made me blush.
(iii) each night as I lay in bed forcing myself to sleep, I try not to think of you.. but it can't be helped. and even in my dreams, you keep showing up.
(iv) I love how I can smell your scent when you walk from my behind and cover up my eyes. I don't say a word. silently, I'm hoping you'd still do it.
(v) I've been doing all sorts of stuff just to distract myself. but each time I do, the only thing on my mind is how I want to tell you all about those stuff.
(vi) the photos, the messages, your contact number, I just can't force myself to delete it. instead, I reread the messages and look at your pictures whenever I miss you.
(vii) I remember how you held my hand, looked into my eyes and asked if I was okay. you made everything feel better that night. I'm not fine now.
(viii) you keep communicating indirectly. and like a living plant you keep watering the feelings I have for you. you never allow it to die. and I never show it but I badly want to respond.
(ix) I tried to forget about you. I tried to forget the memories. I tried to forget the feelings. I tried to forget that I want you.. I tried to forget about you. I forgot to forget about you.
(x) I bound myself to write poems about you and I keep promising to have my last entry with you in it. but promises keep getting broken and here I am, once again, composing.