Maybe I'm just wishful
Pondering a concoction of questions
Desires dueling with my consciousness
Thinking maybe I'll do something out of routine today
I don't want to live in a way where I regret what I didn't do
push me
or
pull me
Often times I'm wishful at this time of night, a thought for actions
Nothing but me and a candle, my laptop, and the large lack of light
What a way to wonder what I could do rather than not do
Considering dreamt up realities perhaps
Maybe it's just thinking

I feel so much passion,
It is stirring inside,
I opened my heart,
And closed off my mind,

I followed the feeling,
That showed me the way,
Through the dark nights,
To see the new days,

I needed to find You,
I searched far and wide,
I'm grateful to have You,
As a part of my life,

You make me so happy,
You make me so sad,
You make me so angry,
You make me so mad,

I wish I never found you,
I wish I never had,
I have fallen in love,
I have fallen so bad.

We'd be in a room alone
Where no one can see our deeds

Your lips land on mine
Embracing each other

My hands go up your blonde hair
Your hands go to my void-black hair

I taste your saliva in my mouth
The space between us thins

I look into your eyes
and get lost in the blue

I feel the muscles on your arm
I lay myself on them

I fall asleep next to you

I feel like a creep, a stalker, a freak,
It wouldn’t be so if I moved my feet.
If I could walk over and say hello
And tell her the things I’d like her to know.
The time would be neat, pleasantly sweet.
It could be so if I would just speak.

I watch at a distance, scared I’ll seem weak.
It wouldn’t be so if I took the leap
Of faith, and with courage, gave her a smile,
Bridging the sea between our two isles.
Our eyes they would meet, such a pleasant treat.
It could be so when I dream as I sleep.

I feel like a freak, a stalker, a creep.
I wish it weren’t so, but I’m in too deep.

11/24/18 12:55a