When I was a young man, fighting the system,
All alone, insecure in my skin,
Hiding the pain & the madness within,
I followed the crowd & tried to fit in,
But the battle inside was taking it's toll,
& I Truly believed I would never grow old,
Became clear as I started to stumble,
My body broke down, caved in & crumbled.
As a young man I was hyperactive,
On the move, always distracted,
I couldn't be myself, I was so unattractive,
Wearing a mask, I was always acting,
Putting on a brave face,
I couldn’t keep up, so I travelled at my own pace,
I needed my own space,
I never had a mirror on the wall in my own place.
Don’t you run, face your fears,
Just dry your tears, I say,
Don’t you run, face your fears,
Just dry your tears.
Full of excuses & ill demands,
Asking myself where the **** do I stand,
I was so full of hatred, ready to attack,
I didn’t know what was real,
Didn't know how to act,
But my back is against the wall,
& I need help facing reality,
Because the lines are blurred,
& I need help finding clarity.
I don't wanna walk this walk no more,
But I keep getting pushed by an unknown force,
I was an unborn spawn,
All tucked up, still safe in the warm,
I was given no choice in the matter,
My umbilical cord was torn,
& they took me out of the arms of my mother,
When I needed her care & I needed support.
Rambling on.
LM