How would I like to be loved?
It is a very difficult question
Because, though I appear, at first glance
To be "The Guy Next Door"
The reality, I assure you, is entirely different
Firstly, every individual is different
Secondly, I am autistic
And finally
There is so much about me
That you will get to know
Only if you are a good friend of mine

How would I like to be loved?
Well, let me tell you
Love is not all about candlelight dinners
Nor is it about *** in the bedroom
It is about being there for each other
No matter what
If I truly love someone
I would be ready to go to jail for her
Of course, not if it is for something ethically wrong
But you get the idea

How would I like to be loved?
If you have seen the Tamil movie "Thiruchitrambalam"
Then you would understand
If I were to say
That I want someone to love me
The way Nithya Menen loved Dhanush
In that amazing movie

How would I like to be loved?
If you've seen me at my worst
One of those days
When I am in one of my rages
And keep shouting and breaking things
Or I lose my focus at work
Due to all my insecurities
Rearing their ugly heads
Or I simply drown myself in my thoughts
Refusing to come out of my bed
Or I cry like a child
Drowning myself in a tidal wave of self-pity
And you still love me the same
As you did when I was at my best
Then it is indeed true love
Enough said

How would I like to be loved?
When I hear one of Harris Jayaraj's romantic melodies
And can instantly relate to it
I know that I am in love
And that love is real, not reel

How would I like to be loved?
If you ask me how was my day
And I go on and on
Droning about the technicalities of my work
Or cribbing about various issues
Such as candidates, clients or my boss
And you never tire of listening to me
Then I know you are truly in love
Also, if I keep asking you how was your day
Every single day after work
And you never once tire of answering such a mundane question
If that is not true love
I don't know what is!
And on that note
It's time to wrap up this little monologue
And return to hard reality

At the moment, I am fine
I am part of a rich family
But more importantly, a loving family
I have a decent job
And a stable career
Most of all
I have a few close friends
Whom I can count on, anytime
So, you can say
That my life is pretty much sorted
Except, of course, for a bit of work stress
Which is one of the occupational hazards
Of being a recruiter
So, is there anything missing?
Surprisingly, the answer is yes
Romance
What wouldn't I give
To fall in love?
My heart yearns for that chance
To meet a special someone
Who has the potential
To change my life
In ways that I would least expect
It can be anyone
A friend
A colleague
Someone in my poetry circle
Or for that matter, comedy circle
A friend of a relative
A friend of a friend
Or even a total stranger
Of course, the last option is rather unlikely
Anyway, the point is
I would love the chance
To share my thoughts and feelings
My beliefs and ideas
My darkest secrets
And most importantly
My love and affection
With that special woman
Of course, only if she is okay with it
Because, true love works both ways
Well, it's not like I haven't fallen in love before
In fact, it has happened to me twice
But on both occasions
My love wasn't reciprocated
Therefore, what wouldn't I give
To fall in love once more?
I am keeping my fingers crossed
That it will turn out to be a case of "third time lucky"
Assuming, of course, that it happens in the first place

True love may be tired,

not capable, not obliged --


just sweet, a sweetheart.

I didn't even ask him
what kind of music he digs,
for his voice alone
is my new favorite record.
I didn't bother finding out
his kind of taste in music,
for my newfound orchestra
comes from his lips.

I didn't even ask him
what kind of films he watch,
for even reality feels like a movie
when he came from the side door,
that's a film I've never seen before.
The ****** is when I was falling
and he was there, ever ready,
waiting and willing to catch me.

I didn't even find out
what kind of books he reads,
for his way with words
is already a novel of poetry.
I didn't even dare ask him
what he thinks of the bible,
for his articles and greetings
alone are my homily.

I didn't even find out
if our taste in music, cinema and literature matches and if I should go otherwise.
You only do that in shallow,
short-lived connections.
I didn't even bother finding out
if our taste in things aligns,
for he already spiced up my
underseasoned life.

People ask me why I do it.
How do I manage being here
When my Love is
1,446 miles away
Thirteen states away
One time zone away.

"How do you do it?"
"I could never do a long distance relationship." They say.
"I would never be able to handle it."

Well, the truth is
The way I can handle it
The way that helps me to "cope"
Is purely the fact
That my relationship is not
a Long Distance Relationship at all.

In this Love miles may be tangible
but they are everything but definable.
We had Love before there was a distance
and that distance will never be used to
Define us.

No matter how many miles there may be
I can still feel her Spirit with me.
Her laugh rings in my ears when I can barely muster a chuckle
Her fingers gently touch my skin when I drift off away at night
I can hear the gentle yawn of her voice when I get up saying,
"Good morning."
I can feel her singing along with me in the car to our Song when my voice cracks.

Our relationship is not a Long Distance Relationship.
Just because there is distance
does not mean that distance defines It.
She isn't absent until I come home
or when he visits me
My Love is always here.
She may be in whispers, and small chuckles, and light sighs
But a part of her is always here
Always with me
Always there
and I can feel it.

So in a sense
our Long Distance Relationship
has no distance at all.
Because creating distance means to separate or to bring apart
And that's not what our relationship does in the slightest.
If anything
these 1,446 miles bring us closer
Closer than we could ever imagine.

I'm not saying that I enjoy
not being able to physically see her everyday.
But this chapter in our Love is not hard or difficult or too much to handle
And it certainly isn't bringing us apart.
Because we both do not see any other option
This is worth it.
This is right.
This is It.
This is the kind of "It" that everyone talks about
we all hope for "It", search for "It", even die for "It."
and we are so blessed to have found It so early.

So these 1,446 miles will not be permanent
but they are so indescribably worth it.

We've heard a lot about true love
Seen it in countless movies
Read about it in countless books
But does it really exist?
Well, I'd like to think that it does
You see, I'm speaking from experience
When I first fell in love
I felt like a bird
That had just sprouted wings
And was ready to take off
And experience the sheer joy and excitement
That comes naturally with flying
Especially if it's the first time
I felt like every single day
Was something to look forward to
And I managed to derive some interest
Even out of the most boring lectures
You see, I was doing my MBA then
Anyway, cutting to the chase
It ultimately turned out to be a case of unrequited love
But, as they say
It was totally worth it
My second tryst with love, though
Wasn't quite the same
Arranged marriage, love *** arranged marriage
You can call it whatever you like
But it doesn't change the fact
That it was never going to end well
To put it plainly
We were incompatible
And the eventual divorce
Was a blessing in disguise
I thus learnt the hard way
That it is not enough to be in love
And that is absolutely essential
To have things in common
The more, the better
So, coming back to true love
Does it really exist?
Well, my answer will remain 'Yes'
After all, I'm a hopeless romantic
And I'm not about to give up
Just because of one bad experience
I also believe
That it's a question of when, not if
And I happened to learn
Through a Facebook post
One out of countless posts that I've seen off late
That you shouldn't worry about finding the right woman
Just focus on being the right man