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Descovia Jul 2022
[Chorus]
I'll never go back home.
I'll never go back home...
I'll never go back home.
I rather be all on my own.
History rewritten in stone.
Not to burden anyone
in a place
Where I never belong.
You will miss me being around
Remember my voice
This is the way peace sounds.
What goes up.
Must come down..down...down...down....



If it's persistent.
Then remain consistent
In the process of handling it.
Temporary problems
Never require a permanent solution.
It may bring silence
In the most dreaded nights.
Blinded by rage
Remember all in sight.
Think twice before you
remove yourself from your own life.
Everyone involved in this story
Composing their chapters.
Trying obtain resolve
Regain. Recover. Repeat.
Questioning everything except
The truth in all which is right.
Detrimental to determination
Destiny, comes in search for you.
As so it does for me. It does for all.
Realistically, there is no down fall.
If you never stay down, from the moment you fall.
It's not just fact. It's honesty by Default.
Persephone Jan 2022
To all the ones who didn’t make it,
Tell me are you finally at peace?
Did the weight of the world truly leave you be?
I’m simply asking because I am one of the ones who did make it
And wonder what would have happened if I didn’t make it?
Has the addiction to be perfect stopped eating you from the inside out?
Or the need to please everyone, by now surely that drive must no longer be around?
To all the ones who didn’t make it, tell me it got easier?
What about the voices, the voices in your head that could never be drowned out, the voices that always told you “you’d never be good enough” for the love of god tell me they finally listened, tell me they finally shut up?
And are you still able to feel numb to all the hurt?
That you don’t have to fight the cravings any longer? Tell me, tell me there is no harm to just giving in?
Tell me, tell me please
To all the ones who didn’t make it, tell me how it was worth it?
Or would you rather ask me first?
Would you rather ask me how warm the sun feels on a lazy august afternoon?
Because you can’t seem to remember what that feels like any longer
Or if the roses still bloom with the promise to smell sweet and to bring the honey bees around?
You’re starting to forget what they look like
What about chocolate you ask, is it still known to melt in your mouth and bring a smile to your face?
At least that is what you think the rumours you heard say
And is laughter with loved ones truly contagious?
It’s been a while since you’ve done it yourself
You go on to ask about blue skies and cozy rainy days
Old teachers that made you fall in love with learning and the ones you’re happy you’ve forgotten about
We discuss friendships new and old and how far they’ve come sadly in your absence
And when I’ve answered all your questions you finally agree to answer mine
But I simply smile and say,
To all the ones who didn’t make it, may you please forget I ever asked?
This year was supposed to be better
It was to be the year I got my life back together
Last year was incredibly horrible
This year I was hopeful
It was a mistake to feel that way
My accident left me feeling such dismay
Leaving me with such hatred towards the drunk driver that could've ended my life
He almost took away my chance to find a wife
It's been 6 months since the crash
I'm drowning in so much debt; I need some freaking cash
My brother wants me out by next year
Tbh it makes me wish I never moved here.
It's been 3 years and I never experienced a year of happiness
Everything I've been through built up so much stress
All this stress adds to my depression and makes me prone to suicidal thoughts.
Lately I've been thinking about what it feels like to die
Will I feel anything, will anybody even cry?
Does anybody truly care about me?
Or am I just an empty soul internally.
This is how this year has got me in my feelings
Just a lot of things that's been on my mind lately
birdy Feb 2021
Sometimes they yell,

"WORTHLESS!"

And I listen,
Because

"Listening is the polite thing to do."
Pensai Jan 2021
Alone, cold,
Misunderstood.
Fighting a battle that began before our conception.
Cursed. The physical manifestation of ones fathers mistake.
Emotions removed, confiscated. No longer relevant.
Useless.
Sympathy lost when love failed us.
Patience is the only retribution.
The endangered struggling black father.
On the verge of self destruction.
Restricted from the love of his own life force.
With no direction. No support.
Intense emotions personified by a series of precise phrases representing static progress and consistent negligence.
Our efforts are never enough.
Our words mean nothing.
Our concerns, suppressed.
Our worries, neglected.
Our respect, vaporized.
Our life. Devalued.
The endangered species

The struggling black father...
Depression can be detrimental to a Black Father determined to defy history. Men struggle. Men fail. Sometimes life deals us a ****** hand that takes time to play through. But society has no patience for a man in the process of bettering himself. Especially a father....
Clove Jan 2021
I think about dying
At least once a day
It's gotten to the point
Where I crave death:
To the point where suicide
Doesn't seem so bad and selfish and cruel
But more like a solution to all my problems

Of course, I'd rather die
From natural causes
But the progression is way too slow
So, I'm trying to speed it up a little
By destroying my body in the best possible ways:

-Junk food
-Laziness
-And bad ******* hygiene
You're all welcome to my funeral. I'll be in a glass coffin so everyone can take turns watching my body rot. ♡^♡
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