Rainy days mud
my garden, the golden root is rotting

my wishing well spills over
I am spent

flaccid roads to the city
get me nowhere, no one wants

to pay for that, the world stands still
my little son is sleepwalking around me

by touch, cow and calf look
at me and frown, sighing

vapours muffled by the fine droplets
of rainy tears on the globes of my eyes

the sachets of water in which the world
always is upside down

a violet hangs and thinks:

mud will become waterproof
slate, eventually

It all came to a standstill,
A day when time stood still,
A beautiful world, fogged and grey,
Grief was its own land, okay?
But the sun arose the next day,
And we woke up anyway,
When the past was  a distant land,
Time stood still, not so grand........

the world is slowing down

a mist of milky gossamer moves in
between
my will and things to do
the clear shapes of objects
are growing soft and dull
the moment's urgency
yields to my ponderings
   of possible decisions
abstract rigidity arrests the words
things stay forever as they are

   is it a sense of death
   that delicately touches on my neck
   and steals from me the comfort
   of continuous change?

life seems to walk away
in long and measured stride
the kitchen clock has never been so fast

it measures time
from here up to the stars

it counts
and blows
the moments of my delicate eternity
one by one
into the past

* *

I hate you being here in my space reminding me of all my mistakes

I know better but I don’t ever do better

My life is at a standstill whenever I choose to stand still with you.
You
of all people, I choose to stand with you.

I tire of playing the victim.
Tired of being the damsel in distress,
I’m more than capable of rescuing myself

But it hurts now, like it always does
and I feel lonely in your company like I always do
and you look at me with eyes that seem lost in someone new and I know the truth
I’ve always known the truth..

You have never loved me and I let you use me
Use me up until I had only a few drops left.
I let you.. I always let you..

Eternity is in our hearts
Smaller than I knew
It can be but meet seconds
As long as I stand with you

It doesn't always last forever
Fleeting as the morning dew
It's those perfect moments
With family friends loved ones too

Eternity is when time stands still
Those moments that our love grew
The moments we want to never end,
from them precious poems we drew

Sitting here I realize
That surely I will fail
For homework I do not have
Eternity to prevail