She stood so thoughtfully,
At the person in front of her,
Yet all she could think of,
Was the fat within her body,
Because opposite the girl,
Stood her reflection,
Because it wasn’t bullying,
If you told yourself the truth.

A SMILE IS
the best makeup
ANY GIRL
can wear.

Wish I could do something right
So words would ring true
Wish I met high expectations
Maybe then I could lose a few

I wish I was not weighted with
Weakness well within my core
If only I was put together differently
Strength would emit from every pore

I create my shortcomings
How am I sabotaging my own goal?
Not trying in the first place
Allowing fear to take control

My heart bleeds in anticipation
Before cuts have a chance to appear
Live my life in apprehension
Assuming danger to always be near

My motionless state of insecurity
Realm of dysfunctional doubt
I forever am encapsulated in time
My skull is a jail and I cannot get out

I cannot stand who I've become
Cannot stand my own reflection
This person I view in the mirror
With no grasp of time or direction

Expectation destroying tender brain
Watching it chase thoughts around
Want to corrall the wayward beasts
To some corner to never be found

Time keeps doing *****
Throwing me place to place
I attempt to assert dominance
It responds by quickening pace

Fearing not the days passing
But my use of how many given
Not for lack of trying you see
I work hard but most days aren't worth living

My arms too weak to carry this load
My dreams too disobedient
Walls are whispering to eachother
Starting to question my sanity and sense

I cannot see my image clearly
Behold no beauty in my eyes
Pacing through flaws as I please
Every night escape with highs

Struggling to remember who I was before
Lost important parts of my soul
Wish I had done things differently
I'd sacrifice all I own to again be whole