Wrapped in your scent
I think of then
I think what could have been
If i had felt something more
If loving people wasnt a chore
I wish i could do more
We
Could have done more
But oh
Love is a bore

No

Love is fire
We were rain
Love was never
Part of our game
Your name
It sends chills down my spine
And no
Not the good kind

We were wet
Sloppy
Gross
And you loved the most
I was new to this feeling of comfort
Comfort
Was it comfort?
Was it comfort that kept me up at night
Wondering if my head was alright
Wondering if i was holding you tight
Enough?
Because you never seemed ok
With my selfish
Distant ways
And i never knew what to say
To do
How to act

But today
Holding your essence
In the naked palm
Of my hand
I felt that slighy
Small
Maybe

We could have been something someday

Promised myself I'd keep it innocent
At least for awhile
But like the greater Gods I gave into temptation
Skin agaisnt skin
The most delightful of sins
We're not in love
I don't even know your last name
We're ******* just to feel
Now you and I have a past
You're the name at the bottom of my glass
We only talk when it's convenient for you
Or when we're drunk after having a few
We have nothing in common
Just a mind full of past lovers and a history of sad ***
Line after line she'll get off his mind and then my body will be on his
In between sheets like a man in between homes
I'm not the one
Not even his number one
Maybe it's fate maybe it's my lonely mind looking for a mate
It's not love
It's not lust
We collect together like dust
The rusted parts of us beat in unity at the peak
But we don't see eye to eye
I can't remember how we started to speak
Will we ever say goodbye for good?

I keep trying to write
About us mostly
But i cannot
Fathom words
To tell about
This feeling in my chest
And this wrenching of my gut
And how the idea of
This nausea
Is so good
And i cannot
Write into life
How my skin is bursting
When i read your name
Or when i see you
And feel you
And how everything
Every being
Every particle
Every small microscopic
Atomic
Piece of me
Is whispering
Your name

The other day
I thought to myself
Maybe I am over you
Maybe I am holding on
To feelings that are no longer
Growing on their own

Today
I saw a picture
Of you and a woman
More well-known
Than you could ever dream of being

A week from now
She won't remember you
What you look like
What your voice sounds like
And she doesn't realize
Just how lucky she was
To even learn that today

In a few months
I will see you again
And I can do nothing
But hope
That you will touch me
In a way
That you will never touch her

I’m sorry if I’m affectionate
I think you’ve misinterpreted
Didn’t mean to lead you on
But then again you don’t care

Don’t know why I do it
I don’t yearn for you
I’m just stuck
Between myself and others

They want us to happen
As if we’re a cool show
I’m not that into you
As you are too

But I don’t know
If I’m telling the truth
My brain says “You love him”
My heart says “You don’t”

They've switched roles
All because of you
And you couldn't care less
About how I feel

But genuinely, I’m scared
I don’t want to fall for you
The evidence speaks it
But my emotions are tired

It’s hard to like a mere figment
It’s hard to like you
Your ******* ways are disturbing
And you’re childish, well that’s worse

You act a certain way with me
But I see that with other girls
You constantly approach me
But I shrug it off

Maybe you’re annoyed
Even ****** at me
But I can’t do anything
I’m scared to show it

Unless you confess
Everything would be the same
We would just be friends
And nothing more

I forgot to mention, one other thing
The feelings I have for you
May be fake
For I like another guy
Other than you.

Stuck on the last and my confusing past
Gave him my heart and pretended it was poetic art
But now I've found a new canvas
Nothing personal, just the sound of flesh against flesh
No common interests
Nothing deep
Just bruised skin and mortal sin
It wasn't love
It wasn't lust
Just two lonely bodies