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manya Apr 2020
It was a Saturday,
the 16th i guess.
The last time
you held me in your arms
so safe and sound
like you wouldn't let go
Even if the strongest force on earth
Were to try and part us
As you gently stroked
The curls of my freshly washed hair
watching the summer zephyr fly by
As we dawdled around
One last time
Until the next last time
Waiting for the rain to bless us
With all those memories again
that were now etched in
those paths we used to travel upon.
And like all the previous farewells,
You said your bit once again
And i shed a tear or two
as we both said our saccharine goodbyes
And i forgot to gift you your letter away
The one i had handcrafted
to be one of the souvenirs
of our little rendezvous we had from time to time,
unaware, that that may be the last one ever.

It was a Saturday,
The 16th i guess.
A year had passed by
And your name still came out of my mouth
Like the sweetest honey dripping out
While i mindlessly shared conversations about you
To the strangers out there in the wild
as they told me to stop loving you,
that i could only love so much
till it consumes me
In its unfair nature.
But oh darling,
If you only knew
It was your love that kept me going
On the most difficult of my days,
As i stared at that letter i never gave you
Long enough for your ghost
to come by and soothe me
with a voice so tranquil
One so similar to yours.
And oh darling ,
If you only knew
That i looked for your love
in our hackneyed texts
And your one word replies
a love that never existed
But seemed so real to me
That it became a drug
I would devour
every second of every day.

It’s a Saturday.
Saturday the 16th.
It has been 2 years
since i have last thought about
Your pearl like pretty eyes
and a smile so warm-
Just Like those homemade brownies
I used to bake for myself
Every time you left me heartbroken
As i ate away the pain
Till I could eat no more.
And oh darling,
It’s time i finally tell you
That today is the last time
I Ever think about you,
That you no longer remain my idol
The one i looked up to for love
Because i’ve found someone better,
And that better is me.
So now i say my final goodbyes
As i remove you
from my ‘favourites’ list
And block your number
So i'm not constantly reminded
Of what could've been
And write out my future,
Of what it will be,
Without you.

- happy
Esme Apr 2020
Yes, it seems I have everything.
Everything.
Nice husband, nice house/ home, (yes that's how you should say it or it's interpreted, so maybe it should be the other way round 🙄, nice car, the whole so called 'package' .
Yet, you aren't in the group because you aren't.
No kids, no connection.
That's how simple it seems,
Simple from this direction.
They don't, they don't need too.
So. So stop ******* hoping.
But if I could include his kid, I'd fit in a different group, 'feel sorry for her'.
no truth login Apr 2020
who can hold the wind in his fist?

~for Ken Pepiton~

your poems full of hints and innuendo,
most of them I don’t get, of stuff, I don’t know, no clue,
my education impoverished, which is why lucky me,
I’m getting my viral signed check for 1200 bucks,
yes siree

but some college educated sharp eyed feller,
said look, see how Ken keen, has the bestus, the real tuff stuff,
hidey holed in the footnotes purposed for you to miss it,
****, he was right, cause I found what you hided!

<>

who can hold the wind in his fist?

an inquisition worthy of a thousand answers,
my Roman slave cautions forbearance, whispering in
my one remaining unconquered Gauguin ear, just the best,
these time of times, hanging heavy, be sweet, leave out the chaff

I, cannot hold the wind in my fist,
for it has always befriended, going
over my life-coarsened skin,
through my-stubbled fingers,
cooling and christening, constant teasing kissing
as it was born anew, a first time poem,
it was meant to be unkept and unkempt


you might want to hold on, keep it, for its touch is indeed
that of a first time lady loved, savoring the cool,
and the heat simultaneous, no fool us, empowering,
the wind forever runs freely, between, never sticking,
going around my body, into my open orifices,
sometimes caressing, sometimes troubling,
its power leaving us atrembling, moved, straighter or bent over


those who created wind and water had many reasons,
but their first purpose was to constant enliven the human mind
with the softest message that true freedom is never bounded,
nature’s song is refrained, “man, be unrestrained,”
it’s majesty then greatest,
men may fool themselves with lines and divisions,
Earth’s best best seen in its unconstrained, searching character
Where Shelter Apr 2020
the worlds illness so pervasive,
the pandemic horror stories are my-brain-endemic,
so pervasive, every ache, tremor, is now virally suspected,
proof that my customized angel of death has arrived, I’m seizing up.

the latest wave session of walking depression, conflates both sides
of my brain, the intersection at right, left, the intellect is mowed
down with woe-down, by the stark reality of emergency facts,
apex or art, looking at months and lives ever trembilzed.

don’t even bother like I did at early firsts, when?
by asking where shelter, the raison d'être of my existence,
the poetry no longer synapses, the currents loop over and over,
the intellectual processes neutered by sadness virus un-encountered.

once upon a time I thought, even believed, that my life’s inquiry,
was answerable, with customized solutions for each,
but now, don’t believe in shelter of any kind, no,
acknowledging I’m so lost, no recovery efforts,

will be attempted.
Nat Lipstadt Mar 2020
~
“My reasons for writing had to be my own, divorced from expectation.
There would be no reward.”

Ta-Nehisi Coates, “We Were Eight Years in Power”

<>

certain words, hers, previous unknown, or, better,
not yet your own,
acquire your devotion, all the my oh my of possessed tenses,
words ironic, for they are the shoving of contrary adhesive separators,
AC/DC currents running together, a single physical electric stabbing,
owning you, but gulfing away those customized,
prized illusions yet kept,
freeing finally by focusing on the single commandment that matters:


Expect nothing, but write, knowing the only reward,
is the satisfying of self-imposed goals and conditions,
that are will always be,
always,
one more step and edit away from attainable, maybe.

My reasons, my illogical reasonings, admixture of anguished highs and loving lowlights,
a porridge of seeds that need burying to be borne,
in soil of a soiled soul, write to breathe, write to see, write to taste,
write to smell, write to hear my voice say,
not good enough,
even when it might be, just, barely, though that bar is a
moving target,

always
a perpetual notch too high.

My reward for acknowledging, accepting, no denying, freeing, finally,

There would be no reward






11:02 Sabbath
February 22, 2020
from deep in the internal confessional
Irene J Apr 2020
Somewhere beyond the sea,
lay a no man island.
Hidden with a mystery
no man dare to reveal.

The sound of the waves
keeps on sweeping me away
from the land,
taking me to somewhere,
with no destination.

And then I know.
Somewhere beyond the sea,
there is hope,
with a hopeless dream.
23.03.20
Jenish Apr 2020
Yes
Silently conquering mind, as if no other options to bloom
Her dead brain body still breathing, while my heart pleading a big big
No
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