Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
SL Oct 2023
Looking outside and all
I see is chaos
The wind howling through
The apartment that I live in
It looks and sounds like
The chaos in my head
The dripping of rain
Are silent but still there
These are my tears
That fall down my face
Onto the pillow in my room
Where no one is with me.
What my life is like with fighting the silent but chaotic parts of me.
SL Oct 2023
Silently screaming out loud
No one can hear me
No one can see me suffer
I am slowly running out
Out of air to breathe
Every tear I have cried
Sits on my pillow
The pillow that no one sees
The silent cry for help
I say that I am fine
But I'm dying on the inside
What happens if my silence
Is the thing that kills me
Life is life
Death is inevitable
I welcome it everyday
I have been off line for a while. This is mental health awareness of how the silence of the question are you ok?
Lux Oct 2023
One word was enough for me to go down,
bring enough thoughts for me to drown.
One stupid word and habits change forever,
acting in a way I thought I would never.

No longer able to eat or drink,
making my stomach shrink.
Relationships with food became tough,
I’ve to lose weight otherwise I’m not enough.

Brain won’t allow me to keep down food,
fat is how I’m being viewed.
Counting calories wasn’t enough to be thin,
hopefully throwing up is the way to win.

Whatever goes down must go up,
lose more calories while you clean up.
One word was enough to bring me here,
to a place where food is my biggest fear.

The worst part is that I don’t want to change,
world without worrying of weight is strange.
Some day it won’t be about skinny anymore,
Throwing up food will become a chore.

Living off of water and air,
eating just to satisfy those who care.
What goes on afterward you can’t know,
there’s nothing that would show.
Lux Oct 2023
One word was enough for me to go down,
bring enough thoughts for me to drown.
One stupid word and habits change forever,
acting in a way I thought I would never.

No longer able to eat or drink,
making my stomach shrink.
Relationship with food became tough,
I’ve to lose weight otherwise I’m not enough.

Brain won’t allow me to keep down food,
fat is how I’m being viewed.
Counting calories wasn’t enough to be thin,
hopefully throwing up is the way to win.

Whatever goes down must go up,
lose more calories while you cleanup.
One word was enough to bring me here,
to a place where food is my biggest fear.

Worst part is that I don’t want to change,
world without worrying of weight is strange.
Some day it won’t be about skinny anymore,
Throwing up food we become a chore.

Living of of water and air,
eating just to satisfy those who care.
What goes on afterwards you can’t know,
there’s nothing that would show.
Phia Sep 2023
It is 6 AM
And the light of the morning
spilling through the cracks of the blinds
is a bittersweet reminder
that yet another day has passed
and I am still here.
I can't help but think
with each rising sun,
that maybe,
just maybe,
I will be okay.
This was the first thought that I had when I woke up this morning so it's a little rough
Joshua Phelps Sep 2023
I hate to admit
That dissociation
Is a friend of mine.

Putting myself on autopilot,
Just so I can survive.

Separating from reality,
Because simply living
Is all I’ve got this time.

I wish you could
See me in the state
That I’m in now

Broken, bruised,
So critical.

It’s absolutely pitiful.

I’m tired of feeling low,
But I keep dragging myself
Down,

Sinking and
Caught in the undertow.

Someone wake
Me from this
Mental charade

Because I’m tired
Of all the games,
And the iron bars that
Keep holding me down.

It’s hard to thrive,
When I can’t figure
Out how to figure
Myself out.

Happy anniversary,
Trauma, guilt and
Doubt.

The past is very
Critical and I
Just want out.

I keep waiting
For an answer, but

I know I’m the only
One who lets myself
Down one more time.

I hate to admit
That dissociation
Is a friend of mine.

And I’m sorry,
If I disconnect
Sometimes.

Please don’t give
Up on me now

I just need someone
To make me feel alive
One last time.
Next page