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Key Giovanni Dec 2017
She needs him

And she wants him, a lot

But needing someone is neither beautiful nor romantic

It’s ******* painful

But she embraces the pain

He knows how to paint a smile on her face

Make her laugh until her stomach hurts

But what he doesn’t know is

Sometimes his words carves the pain in her chest

His silence digs a hole in her heart

And she cries her heart out at night

Whilst blaming herself

For all the mess that happened between them

She tells herself that the next day

The sun will come up

And she will eat her breakfast

And she will drink her coffee

Sadly, things sometimes don’t go as planned

She wakes up the next morning,

Again, tears rolls down her cheeks

She hates herself for being weak

She hates herself for being not good enough

She is tired of doubting whether people are coming or going

Still, she is hoping that he would stay

She would rather be hurt by him than be loved by anyone else

She keeps telling herself that she’s okay

Whilst her heart bleed continuously

She knows that she was doping herself a ****-full of lies

Yet she chooses to drown and bleed without him knowing it

She doesn’t know how to love herself

but she really does love him wholeheartedly and blindly

And even if it hurts, she would do it all again in a heart beat
Em Apr 2016
It’s April,
And I am the fool.
It’s Tax Day,
And I've made my mark as “single.”
It’s Earth Day,
And you'll never give me a bouquet, so just pick me a flower.
It’s Duke Ellington Day,
And you like jazz music as much as you like when I call you my King, so why am I still waiting in line for the throne?
It's Spring,
And I am in love.
Love me, love me, say that you love me...
K Balachandran Feb 2016
It was  me who took her by the hand to the moon,
she now says she is there on her own!
A *******  the moon that pretends she forgot,
everything happened before, in no time!

I held her gently by her waist and danced,
she couldn't match my speed, she wobbled,
still she pretended her status was single,
on the sly, she was waiting for the prince of the moon
S Smoothie Dec 2015
It's a painful stretch to re-loving
Gargoyles in clusters clutch at my heart
Talons pierced and locked wings wrapped upon layers
Pulling each one away takes insufferable self violence
Just to clear a small space to let you through
Too many years of inequity
have placed needs burning in my heart  
you struggle to relinquish your control,
Your gift of consideration is noted.
Your changes have exceeded my expectations
Though we are nowhere near even.
Still, I play it peachy,
Your tenderness, your keeness to please me
Is unnerving,
too little,  too late
Your heart whispers squeal like whistles in the hunt
Unsettling the watchdog beasts
Growling and snarling
Clawing tighter at the leather pith of a stone heart
Your own needs are barking
Your expectations are going to be laid,
I'm letting blood Before your debt is even paid
It's going to be different this time...
Claws tighten, wings gripping tighter
Artehoke heart,
just another set up
I keep anticipating the fall.
I go on pretending in the hope It will become real
Your darkness permeates
your dark love kills
Still, there's something about you
I can't live without.
Folder the kind of pain love rubs in your face
K Balachandran Mar 2015
Your bodkin, seeking my heart if straight,will find it's target quick,
I'll gladly die an honorable death, still remembering the arrows of cupid,
but if your sword, stealthily moves from behind, in deceit, cuts me down,
denigrates love, let darkness shout, from  where once love solemnly stood,
you'll have to be on your knees to seek forgiveness for this sin, it's no win.
K Balachandran Aug 2014
After, a long drawn out burning kiss
that opened a never healing wound
she leaves for the secret rendezvous
in a verdant oasis in a distant desert.
He didn't hear about her even after
light years, remembrance of that
kept on haunting him, for reasons
he wanted to find, he burned and burned.

On a full moon night after million years,
searching in the desert, long hours
sweating and tired like a haunted animal
he found a magnificent Spinx,felt connected
fell for that feminine allure, curved hips
hypnotic eyes of a hermaphrodite,swell of *******,
that illogically prompted him to caress,

towering high at the end of an oasis,
wasn't it  a construct of desire?

he stood, feverishly desiring those pouting lips,
the moment next, missed the one inflicted wound,
in a pit inside  forbidden longings erupt
when speaking  language of desire, poisoned fruits too
taste dark poetry, nature flows to  symmetry
"No man or woman, loved me like that"
a whisper, then a hiss, in passion proclaims
there she was his one time lover, cheat, deserter
of his spirit's mating call, still he isn't free from delusions,
she abandoned him for another, in that too wasn't sure
yet another of her misadventure, does she repent?

"I didn't want to miss you like this" she says
"you mistook that I was in love with her, him or whatever"
entanglements, there were from the word go,
her eyes , he observed were sapphires,
her bleached white bones, were irresistible, totems
he wanted to preserve it in the museum in Cairo
her being grew in to him like an oasis
in a desert, a weary, insane, traveler reaches
just in time for the final peaceful hour before all resolve.

"Are you insane, what makes you do this again" a voice asked,
another million years would pass without any solace,
the sphinx, so magnificent then would be just a sand dune !
They hand in hand, would be walking over it,
that sweet oblivion would remain, birth after birth.
K Balachandran Jul 2014
Mermaid, the moon in my cloudy sky on dark nights,
I treated you like the most precious gift from the Ameer,
in my ****** life, though I  spent just one night with you and fell in love,
I adore you more then my sweetheart of long years,
I remained loyal to you, a dancing girl, more than to my dear wife,
in lonely nights my heart pined for just you, nobody else
I wept bitter tears hoping that you'd somehow hear my sobs,
most hardened stone, your heart was, you never reacted
I heaped praises on you, bought you expensive gifts
lavished perfumes from the most exclusive perfumeries
I waited in the most breathtaking oasis,days on with camels
to take you far and be with you ditching all other loves of my life
my heart on embers, I forgot how respected I was, what was my status,
I became a lowly beggar of your love, in your presence
my eyes lost their glow, got sunken in the cavities making
me look pitiable, my dress was shredded in many places,
my body became emaciated, I made a living only by singing
paeans to women of easy virtue, just to buy as much things
that pleases you,  make you jump up in joy, as soon as you see it.

You drink the best wine, would wear the rarest of lingeries
that peeped out of the muslin dress, I gifted you
still my love, you weren't pleased you looked daggers at me
without any regret, and asked to bring more gold and silver,
it's the life of a slave I happily lived, I know so well
I composed poems on voluptuous mistresses of men of royal linage,
and collected pieces of gold and silver for my labor
with that I made bejeweled  ornaments for your lovely body.
Mermaid, you are a wonder, you walk on two legs,
yet swim in deep waters with others, whom you don't even mention,
I only dream of you and wait endlessly here, all the same contented.

— The End —