do not say sorry
for being human
your forgiveness
is not a crutch
for him to lean on
it is a conduit
for the you
that can swim
across an ocean
alone
while he still hangs
on your ankles
do not say sorry
for being human
while you are still
learning how to do so

love is not patient
love is not kind

love is leaving
the very first time
he puts his hands on you
in a way other than to
worship the skin
that fosters your soul
love is knowing
you are worth more

use his words as tinder
in the fire that drives you
each and every lonesome morning
bask in solitude,
discover you;
every sight and sound
you are not too much
to keep around
he was not enough
to hold on to you
use his fearful words
the ones that used to sting
as the very thing that drives you
to be bolder than you were before
he dulled you out
don't stop now

wait until it hurts to write
and when it hurts don't stop
it's okay to feel everything,
all at once, scattered on paper,
it's okay to give your heart
the right-of-way, it's okay
wait until it hurts to write
and when it hurts,

heal with words

do not use another's hands
to **** your own gardens


when the time comes for your flowers to bloom
you will gaze upon each petal in liberated peace
something you must do alone

do not use another's hands

that man is not your home

I said I wrote poems
N' that I've been stuck in time as of late
You said to write what I know
Who I love, who I crave, what I hate
N then they'll start to flow

I don't know,
But this: I am sick.
Of trying. Fighting. Loving.
I don't know,
But this: I am sick.
Of crying. Shouting. Hurting.
I don't know,
But of this: I am sick.
Of giving my all and getting none back.
I've got a world on my back and no ground below.
I know.

you know I ain't no good
I mix my liquor and my meds
I take a new boy to bed
each night, but you don't judge me
you know I ain't no good
but you see me differently
and I need that reassurance
to keep me grounded lately,
I need that reassurance
that maybe I ain't so crazy

you cannot twist
the bones
in my protruding spine
to get me to dance
anymore

you cannot turn me
on
or off
with your ***** hands
anymore

and leave me on the floor
when you are finished
when you get bored
anymore

I am not your toy
anymore

you are
the second cup of tea
after I spilled the first by mistake
you are
my third time, finally right
you are
stepping on the breaks at just the right time

before a head on collision
you are
the flash I saw before hitting the dash
you are
in between my seatbelt and my veins
you are
calming, cloudy rainy days
you are
something else I've never felt
but never want to stop
you are
new
you are you

cut me open with a sharp knife
so i know you don't have to try
like the others did, they'd pry
forgetting dull  takeweapons more time
and leave a darker scar, it's hard
they have to break past
everything you built to last
like layers of copper skin from years of solitude
use a sharp knife when you open me up for you