girlworm, you grab a wrist like you've known modesty in the shyness of a bare feeling gripped tight on the one offering it
tightrope fingers falling into the spaces of unspoken territory, slipping into familiar qualms like the worn lipsticks that fits the grooves of my lips like an object of my affection
knowing the contour of what i'm never aware of
anxieties creep like an overgrown lawn
these fears personifying into antsy women invading my kitchen telling me that there's not enough ventilation and the stove is on leaking gas into the baby lungs of a young smoker
and when i begin to argue they give both a look of sympathy and disgust as they say "oh child you drown so easily"
so i sit chewing my nails as i count the birds outside flying back and forth from their post as if they can't remember where they're going towards or if there's something that could possibly pull them elsewhere
my mind swirls in the smoothie of a plastic cup that sticks to the coffee table, the rings of different bottles painting circles for me to memorize again
my paradise sits with the roughness of his knuckles and the ambiguity of eyes that could know everything and i would set fire to the stars inside because of the jealousy that grows from pretty things being smoldered under skin
when i begin to lose my person, pale and shivering i go towards it
empty stomached and ready to be buried in the clothes of her
that i can imagine becoming the consistency of yogurt in my lap
kissing back my tremors as i lift up her hair from curious shoulders
dry-heaving the importance of the cheeks that feel warmer as they settle on hands that are brought together as if in deep prayer and i know i will collect myself again one day
girlworm, you're a swarm in my chest and i am me

I am hungry of a touch,
As if my eyes wants you back,
As if your arms invites me,
As if my lips wants yours.

Instinctly I want you,
But I also need reason.
However, a woman has needs too,
And she craves for you.

She longs for your broad shoulders,
For your lengthy arms and legs,
For your caressing fingers,
For your untamed desire.

Take me back to the night,
You stole a kiss,
I kissed you back,
And I was yours.

Where the **** are we going?
Take off the blindfold so that I can see,
ya I know that you said that already,
but we got places to be.

Finally, Jesus now tell me,
what the **** are we doing out here?
And why the hell are you smiling?
The ******* mean that should be clear?

Oh I see, another scare tactic,
let me guess you’re taking control?
You know that this never works,
wait, why the **** did you dig a hole?

What do you mean you’re scared of me?
I’ve always just been here to help.
Oh here we go again about therapy.
******* mean it’s about mental health?

I’m only what you made me, but I like it here,
so I think that I’ll ******* stay.
We both know you don’t have what it takes,
so put the gun down and just walk away.

You keep acting like you don’t know me,
like I’m just a part of the id.
That’s laughable, Brad, you’re an idiot,
I’ve known you since you were a kid.

You act like the drinking was my fault,
but who the **** pulled you out of the gloom?
And what about all those nights you cried,
after grandma died, all alone in your room?

Look, just put the gun down,
and let’s go have a drink.
Nah, you’ll never be done,
thats just what you think.

Fine, go ahead, pull the trigger,
you know I’ll be back in a week.
Bury your issues like always,
but you better bary me ******* deep.

Getting rid of me will solve nothing,
I’ll be with you until you die,
so no goodbyes, I’ll see you later,
but go ahead, give it a try.

*boom