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Beinghonest Mar 2016
I keep flickering between hope and despair the moment you don't reply in five minutes,
Or you send me heart.
I'm struggling, I don't know whether you like me as a friend, or you like like me. And I'm scared it's the first option :(

-just being honest
Beinghonest Mar 2016
I don't know how we got here...

I'll be honest,
I'm sorry that we're always fighting,
That we don't see eye to eye no more,
And that twinkle in your eye is gone -
I'm sorry,
That our love is withering.

I'll be honest,
I miss when things were rosy,
When you and I just made each other blush,
And our lips were inseparable;
When my hands couldn't keep away from your soft skin,
And we were acting lovey-dovey, ignoring the unrequested attention of wandering eyes.

I'm scared, when you scream and yell,
I'm heartbroken, when you cry because of me,
I'm debilitated, when you won't let me hold you,
I'm stunned, when you don't accept my apology.

I miss,
When you and I,
Didn't care much about the label,
We were good friends that's what we said...
But soon later you wanted more:
And you got it...

Started becoming an underused word,
The bonds formed by mischevious nights
Shamelessly crying on one another's shoulders,
And divulging of blackmail-worthy, jaw-dropping secrets,
Starter weakening, separating...

Is there any possibility that things will get rosy again?
That you'll stop getting mad at me and I'll stop hurting you?
Is there a chance, just a slight chance,
That the girl I fell in love with will come back...
Or, have we... Have I killed her?
Maybe I'd send this to a gf when she's fighting with me :3
(but I don't have one right now :'( )
-just being honest
Beinghonest Mar 2016
There are some things,
that I've been keeping for too long in my heart:

I want to make you smile a lot.
I want to make you laugh a lot.
I want to kiss you a lot.
I want to to hold your hands
and I want to hold your waist
and I want to hold your gaze,
because your brown eyes are amazing
to stare at.
I want to tell you that you're beautiful
and make you blush.
I want to make you vulnerable
and hear you tell me sweet things -
I just want to hear you speak for an eternity.
I want you to be cozy in my arms
and I want you to tell me all your deepest desires,
I want you to be happy with me.

I want you a lot,
and I want to tell you that
I'm falling head over heels for your uniqueness,
big brown eyes,
astonishingly cute little smile,
small innocent frame
and sublime voice.

My heart is overflowing
with strong feelings for you, dear -
I'm also longing to call you "baby".
-just being honest
Beinghonest Mar 2016
I want you,
what are you talkin 'bout?
I can't forget you,
you're all I think about.

You can feel it,
I know you do,
the chemistry,
it's undeniable -
the intense gaze,
our eyes locked
We're capable of fixing it -
we just need to rewind.

First it was talking,
then kissing,
and soon later ******* -
but now it's nothing.

Let's go back to square one,
you know we can:
Let's just go back to talking...

They say I should let go,
but I can't.
my heart is
dangling on a string,
attached to your angel wings.
So, my heart is
always with you,
- just being honest
Beinghonest Mar 2016
But I know one thing:
If I had enough skill,
To accurately depict your face
Using paint brushes,
I'd instantly become a world renowned artist...
For creating a masterpiece that trumps the Mona Lisa.
-just being honest
Beinghonest Mar 2016
That's all I said,
Because fear was stronger than my mind's might...
For in reality, I wished to be in your bed.

Relax, ***** minded beauty,
I wished you were sound asleep in my arms...
Because I knew when you're sleeping you'd be more than a cutie
And the comfort of my arms would keep you out of the way of Harm's.

I was so desperate to cuddle with you,
To close the distance that's making me blue,
That I was contemplating pulling a Romeo:
Climbing up your balcony just to serenade you.

But I guess I was too scared,
That you'd be surprised by how much I cared.
I hope I can one day tell her this, but for now, it's too soon, I know she'd be alarmed... Actually I'm not sure, but I just need to rid my heart of this guilt.

-just being honest
Beinghonest Mar 2016
I know of a cute girl,
Who could be the cutest murderer ever -
Because her words are lethal to my weak emotional mind,
And they are somehow make my heart bleed.
To live for another day is what I always plead,
Well aware that if she keeps going I'd die with the biggest grin on my face.
Her sweet sweet words are what I desire, but, they're also Death's ace.
"Everything to moderation" my dad's voice yells in my head -
But how can I determine moderate
When I'm gorging on words that make me higher than ****...
And now, from my negative thoughts and low self-esteem, I'm temporarily freed.
But, to be honest,
I don't mind if I'm her first victim...
Because after my brain's gone erratic from spiked dopamine levels
I'd make sure to share a joke with the Grim Reaper -
Before he flashes his deadth-inflicting scythe at me
And takes me to meet my creator.
She knows how's to use my thirst for words of affirmation to her advantage.

-just being honest
Beinghonest Mar 2016
I saw you in my dreams today,
And now I'm simply frustrated -
Because I don't know what I did wrong...
I'm innocent,
Why won't you just exit my heart?
Stop wandering about in my mind will ya?

I saw you in my dreams,
And I hugged you goodbye -
The FRIENDLY kind,
Even though in that position
I wanted to pick you up and kiss you all over your neck -
And then you kissed me on my forehead.
I told you that you shouldn't do that again,
And you just giggled and smiled -
You simply ignored me,
And you knew that I still liked you:
We're over -
So I'm frustrated,
That I'm the one holding onto you soft kisses
For dear life.

Ill be rid of you...
I still like you,
A part of me will always long to cuddle you
From dawn to dusk,
In early winter morning,
And warm summer nights...
But, too much of me likes you right now.

And I'm certain,
That I'll be free from your mesmerising eyes,
But if it's any consolation...
You were the hardest to let go.
I saw an ex in my dreams, **** when I hugged her I never wanted to let go... But in the dream, she was just a friend, so her kisses were unwelcome ones and I felt like she was toying with me. Then I woke up, realising a part of me still longs for that girl :'(
Beinghonest Mar 2016
Since I'm falling,
I decided to admire the scenery around me--
Since there is nothing I can do to prevent it from happening...
It's true that I don't want to be here--
But look at how bright the orange sun shines,
It's absolutely breathtaking the way it paints the clouds a lovely orange shade.

I mean, I don't want to fall for her,
I don't want to fall in love--
Man, Autumn leaves are something else, right?
They just look beautiful. I love the way conifers look when they are dressed in red, green and yellow leaves.

Where was I?
Yeah, I don't want to fall for her,
Because I'm scared I'll fall out of love,
I'll hurt her and up being the worst person she had ever crossed paths with--
It's so nice the way the wind hugs me,
As I plunge towards the earth's centre,
All because of that pretty lady that's giving me an adrenaline rush.

I'm falling for her,
With the help of Earth's gravitational force,
I'm Accelerating at 9.8 metres per second.
And I've been here before,
Suspended in the air,
Surrounded by clouds--
Plummeting towards the earth's centre.
I know one thing,
When I hit the ground,
My heart will be shattered,
Because it's a fall from an elevated place--
Elevated by flirting and more than friendly hugs--
Because she didn't catch me...
Reality will catch me,
When everything ends.

I kinda know,
That soon the wind's embrace will be gone,
That soon,
I'll look up at the sun, instead of seeing it at my eye level, like I do now.
I know,
Soon,  she'll no longer be interested in me,
Soon,  sunsets won't look beautiful,
Instead they'll remind me of her eyes.
I'll cherish this fall,
Every single second of it.

I'll hold onto the hopes that I'll one day,
meet someone,
Who never let's me reach the ground,
Someone who doesn't even have to catch me--
Because, she'll make me fall for her,
And keep my mind far, far away
From the contemplation of a reality without her.
"Now I'm free, free falling"  - Free fallin by Tom Petty
So, I'm slowly falling for this girl and I'll do my very best to enjoy what she makes me feel.

-just being honest
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