phenomenal! vibrant light-helixes of vortexical sound
bivolving sorrow-joy cascades
into motional peace & silent selfhood surrounded.

Threads are coming together
              I celebrate the infinite beyond
              I know I do not know,
              and question-knowing I discern my choice
encompassed ---
      live and know the life inside
as what it is and can be;
to live and explore unknown chords
of heartsong cloudscapes; to be sound,
to be consciousness of light; to be
light itself and voidness all potential;
to be love and to love&be-loved;
in a timeless stillness forgotten in its thinking of;
to spiral quietly before an ever-emergent soundfulness--
to be deafened with a clarity of hearing! to drown
in colors blooming
in the dark; to feel the breath of things and taste contentment
pure as quartz in spring water, white sage and myrr.

grounded in a vastness spilling symmetry
this is witnessed by a newly discovered self
now swept away with verdant effulgence
---dispersing unity here,
bringing light to this Whole Now that is,
now... here, is an integral clarity,
a clear laying down of that union--
that metaspeech of truth-dwelling seen,
a resident teaching echoed in every breeze
healing into wholeness giving birth to itself forever:
just now noted.

There are so many things that I regret
The list is longer than I can write here
Each day brings more regrets
I regret that I do not learn from past regrets.

I regret not saying I am sorry
I regret not forgiving and moving on
I regret not being fully honest
I regret not letting you in
I regret...*

Reminders of past failures
Ever in the forefront of my mind
Getting lost in the confusion
Reality that I live in
Emotional
Trying and failing
Sorry

(F)rankly
(E)motional
(A)nd
(R)estless

wild and fight, sing fight brawl forever life end for you.
motional fight love is brave it rose through mind forever.
end brawl love to string and kick punch until shard moves like arm lock , leg lock and arm bar is the  brave of the best fight ever day and night is time to win for the fight wolves love fangs through body.

We went for a walk
Into town.
You told me a story
Just to pass the time.
I was quiet as I listened
While trying to figure out if this was just a dream.

We went for a walk
Into town.
You led us to different shops
But never stopped.
I smiled
Telling you about myself.

We went for a walk
Into town and back.
You finally stopped
And sat down in the park.
I sat next to you
But slightly apart.

We went for a walk
Into town and back.
You put your arm around me,
Pulling me closer.
I leaned against you
Trying to hide the motional war inside of me.

We went for a walk
Into town and back.
You leaned in for a kiss
Finding my lips, gently holding me tight.
I closed my eyes
As we disappeared in our own world.

We met up
All the time.
You held my hand
Silently promising your protection.
I told you my problems
Thinking I could lose myself with you.

We met up
All the time.
You would hold me tight
Seeming to never want to let go.
I opened up to you
Believing it would last.

We met up
All the time.
You were always there
Waiting just for me.
I saw a change in your eyes
But I didn’t say a word.

We slowly started to drift apart
Going our own separate ways.
You call every now and then
Asking me to meet up.
I sometimes give in and agree
Sometimes I listen to the confused mess that tells me to ignore you.

We slowly started to drift apart
Going our own separate ways.
You hurt me
Deep inside.
I wonder what
Was going through your head.

We slowly started to drift apart
Going our own separate ways.
You keep leading me
Never stopping.
I am still following you
When I should just let go.

We went for a walk
Into town and back.
We met up
All the time.
We slowly started to drift apart
Going our own separate ways.

Sometimes I wish
We were still together.
Sometimes I wish
You would just leave me alone.
Sometimes I wish
We had never met.

Sometimes I just wish…

D eepest thoughts
E motional breakdowns
P ain
R uining themselves
E vil devil inside
S cared of living
S tressful thoughts
I njured heart
O ffensive with words
N egative thinking kills them inside

L-iving in fear or in hope that you might wake up to see another day.  
I-t may not be lived to the fullest, but may be cut short.
F-ull of opportunities some taken and some lost.  
E-motional it can destroy you in many ways.

Should I blow out the candle of *** and love.
The candle that lit a part of the room
that sat and gazed upon our bodies.
That stayed motionless and dim, stagnant and consistent.

The dim spark tries to match and parallel the electricity that it watches.
The light stays dim, at the corner of the room where it is motional;
watching the bodies.
Quiet in the corner.

Dimming and fading, as the lovers slowly finish and sink into the bed, motionless and still as the candle.

The *** candle gets blown out, as abrupt as it gets lit.  

The *** candle sits at the corner of the room awaiting to be lit again, awaiting the movement it lacks. Never ready to be blown out.
it gently dims, just like the mirrored bodies it watched.