We always had that little spark between us,
which made simple things a joy when we did them together.
There has always been that magnetic energy between us, pulling us.
Closer. Closer.
We have an attraction for one another.
It's made public by the way we can't help but look at each other longly.
But we both know we will never be.
Because we are both smart; smart enough to know we aren't good for each other.
And even though our hearts try to pull us together, we know nothing will come of it.
We'll become closer and closer, but never close enough.
We'll talk until sunrise but that's the only thing that will come of it, and we both know it.
We have a flirtationship.
We flirt endlessly with one another, both knowing,
Nothing.
Will come of it.

I guess deep down
In the parts of me
I try to ignore
As best I can
I will admit
There are nights
Where I begin
To ache
Missing
Whatever the hell it was
That we had
That "flirtationship"
I don't know what it was
But I know
It sure hurt like hell
When you told me
That you loved her
And I discovered
That all those months
I'd spent on you
Were a waste
Because you loved her
The whole time
Well tonight
Is one of those nights
Where I really
kind of
I guess
sort of
miss you
...more than I care to confess

it’s happening
it’s finally happening
a relationship between us
a friendship at most

long conversations as
we’re not doing anything
small smiles and cute
laughs all around

total eye contact
not turning away
for a single second

this is it
this is what I’ve wanted
for so long with you
i just hope it lasts

Trust me when i say,
I never thought I'd admire you.
Silently sitting there
Waiting to catch that sparkle in your eyes.
Your smile; so perfect, so white.
I'm at a lost when you're in my head.

We talked and laughed together.
Talked about relationships and school.
Maybe it was the way you looked at me,
or the fact that you even looked at me
But I wanted more from you,
More than the school hallways.

I still have your notes,
That we passed in Math class.
Do you remember them?
I remember how flattering it was
To watch you beg for homework answers.
I gave them all to you,
expecting a little something in return.
I gave you everything, you gave me nothing.

I truly loved our flirtationship
That is what I liked to call it at least
You gave me butterflies and I developed a crush
You had everything you ever wanted
Even a pawn like me.

Its been years now,
And it still hurts; rejection.
But I have one more note to pass
I'm no longer the girl admiring you from afar
I'm the beautiful woman...you lost
But, don't mind me
I'm just writing you away.

I spilled out my heart to you.
I told you of my issues.
I told you I skipped meals.
How my depression and anxiety worsened.
I told you that you helped me, gave me reasons to recover.
I kept it quite that I self harmed.
I did not want you to know how I cut, burn, bite and scratch myself.
Well at least not yet.
I thought we would stick together .
For five long months we where in a flirtationship.
On month five I thought you would ask me to be yours.
But I found out you had a ******* the side while you played me.
My heart got broke, I fell apart.
I cried in secret for weeks.
Never did I tell my parents about you.
I fell weak and bean to relapse.
I feared I would never find love.
Well I may still be solo but its only been two months.
Since the day you broke my heart.
It's so strange when you talk to me now.
I love we stayed friend's, but I am still a little hurt.
I have moved on.
There's a sweet new boy in my life now.
We met at prom and have talked ever since.
For now we are just friend's.
Taking it slow.
So thank you for breaking me and teaching me.
A new way to love.
You once said you are jelly of the man who gets me.
It could have been you, you could have had me.
But you decided to break me.
So now when I find a good man.
You can sit and weap in you're jealously.