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Noelle Marie Nov 2014
Nothing new
The world is caving
Always on rocky ground
Only needs that tremor strong enough
I turn inside
Replaying
Playing
What ifs
Whys
I'm making sentences that don't make sense
Living a life that never stays stable
A revolving door
A heart so fragile inside that concrete wall
Emptiness I speak
Emptiness I live
Emptiness I feel
Escape I crave
Happy I crave
**** it all, **** it, **** it
I can't do this
Noelle Marie Nov 2014
You've saved me
Outside you look merely mortal
You are anything but
I looked beyond and I saw your shine
You are myth
Beautiful inside and out
Selfless in your giving
Absolute love
I look at you with wonder
The being that you are
Mesmerising in your goodness and light
Undeserving of pain or sadness
I never want to see it
I want to see that muscle process moving lips up curved into a grin
A laugh so full of life even when trouble is upon your shoulders
A voice that gives me what I need
Guidance, love, courage, strength
Lent from you out of love
Words that I need
Comfort that I need
You saved me
It is true, the greatest thing in life is to be loved and to love in return
The greatest thing in life is to have a mother like you
Noelle Marie Nov 2014
I look into the mirror
Sometimes
And I see your face looking back at me
Your smile, your eyes, your lips
I see an absence
And my chest hurts
Nearly 11 years now
I don't know how I remember your face
I don't really
It's slowly slipped away
Memories faded over time
Darkened
By anger, by pain, by sadness, by this yearning for you to be back with me
You protected me as much as you could, loved me I think, made me feel cared for, worthy
I know now why you but I have but one wish
That you'd taken me with you  
That you'd take time to make me feel cared for, worthy again
Come back,
One day,
Some day,
Please,
There is a hole where you once belonged
Noelle Marie Nov 2014
At this moment my existence is in grey, decisions on my shoulders weighing me down
What should I do always on my mind,
Worry in my head, bitterness in my voice, no choice
But these moments, they will pass and Life will begin, it'll slow down and I'll have time
I'll have fun, I'll smile, I'll laugh, I'll settle, see the world and all it's offerings
I'll meet someone
And I'll live in a screaming colour, a world where grey will be forgotten and forever left
Behind, where it should be
One day
Noelle Marie Nov 2014
I cannot believe the **** culture that exists in these modern times. We, as Women live life thinking that our rights have have come a long way since those times when we had little to none but have they really? Have our rights gone anywhere when we are still, now WARNED about ****, when we are told ‘you need to be careful, you’re vulnerable, watch out for ****’.. Why is it our responsibility to not be *****, why is it not our responsibility as a nation to educate our young Men on ****, to educate them on a Woman’s right to say ‘No’ and to not have it ignored, argued with or discussed, to have it accepted, respected. Why is this placed upon our shoulders, something for us to guard against, something for us to worry about as we walk down a street, as we walk through our towns and something for us to be blamed for when we wear a short skirt, a tank top, tight jeans and are therefore ‘asking for it’. I was warned about being ***** today on the bus, an old man said to me ‘you be careful, you watch out, a young woman with a body like yours’. This is the body God gave me, this is the gender God gave me, this is the woman that God made me and why should I therefore have to protect myself against being ***** because of it? This is **** culture and it needs to change NOW.
How can this be accepted? How can we ignore this when we have daughters, granddaughters, sisters, nieces, friends, sons, grandsons, brothers being raised with this perspective, this ideology, this **** culture?
Today, this is said not as a poet but as a woman in this society, as a one-day mother and as an individual who knows that things need to change for the better.
Noelle Marie Nov 2014
Sad
Sing to me now, sing to me
Convince me not to hate you please
Talk to me now, talk to me,
Convince me not to resent you
See me now, see me
Convince me that you haven't been looking through me these 18 years
Hold me now, hold me
Convince me that you feel some affection for me
Comfort me now, comfort me
Give me a taste of something you've never given
Love me now, love me
But even then will I ever believe it?
Noelle Marie Nov 2014
I never knew freedom
Quite like this
I only knew cages, bars and traps
I only knew wishing wishing that I'd have escape
Counting down days hours
I only knew I wanted more more more
Than her words tearing me inside out and down down down in despair and desperation to claw out
I only knew I deserved better
I curled in my window frame, legs swinging, watching the ants go by and that was my life, locked with bars and chains and traps
Sad, sad little girl
Broke free, ran so fast I was free in an instant&
I never knew freedom quite like this.
I don't even remember who that little girl is but I'll never forget.
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