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 Apr 2015 Five Fingers
Remus
Don't fall in love with me.
I will tear you
to bits and pieces
with love, affection, and
poetry.

I'll tell you how
beautiful you look,
and when you ask
"How do I look beautiful"
I'll say
"Well darling, I must get going now."

I'll leave you breathless
in kisses
because you'll never want
to stop but
I'm already in my car
ready to go.

Don't fall in love with me
because I'll become
a female version of
John Green.

I'll write you poetry and
make you the love interest
in my novels,
but there's a reason why I
never finish anything.

I'll fall out of love,
love is boring
and when you
fall in love with me
I'll become uninterested
because I can't chase you
anymore.

It's all in the chase,
because I like getting
what I deserve
but when I get it,
it's not what I wanted.
 Apr 2015 Five Fingers
Aspen
sigh
 Apr 2015 Five Fingers
Aspen
it was nice of you to
say you loved me but
it would have been
nicer if you meant it
it was kind of you to
tell me you cared but
it would have been
kinder if you had been
there when i needed you
it was sweet of you to
say i was yours but
it would have been sweeter
if you had kept me
 Apr 2015 Five Fingers
JustChloe
I didnt mean to hurt you
im sorry if i made you sad
but this love is the first unconditional love i have ever had
its more than you think
Im not just hurting you im hurting me
My broken heart strings ring off key
inside of me an offtune orchestra sings
I have never been perfect
and i never will be
I will never be able to love you like you think
I will never bee all you need
but one day i hope you will leave me
so you can be happy
so im sorry
for hurting you
i hope you dont accept this apology
and forget me
I ****** up. I know that. Guilt comes fast, asking what I was thinking. I was doing it for me, but mostly, I was doing it for you. I wanted what I wanted and what I wanted you couldn’t give me. So I let you give me something else, and I tried to be present, tried to accept it graciously, but my head was elsewhere. Guilt rolls down my back, coating it like tar. My head floating around in space somewhere between “do it for her,” and “this is not what I wanted.” Guilt sits down and pours me a cup of tea.
Personal.
Keep you cigarettes and your bike rides and your middle shelf whiskey
But keep it all to under covers
Hide it up in your designer pillow case
Before you hurt someone else

Oh keep your nightmares and melodies that resonate all through the dark
Keep your silence and your wonder
Wrap it up silk and ribbon laced
Before you break someone’s heart

Keep your stars and fresh laundry, keep your ***** bathroom sink
Keep your bright eyes and your mystery
Encase it inside your hard drive
Because you’re kiss is tattoo ink

Keep your smirks and your ashes, keep your whispers, and your linens and skin
Keep your hallowed muddied hallways, and your misty charcoal eyes
But lock your coveted front door
Let no one within or inside

Keep your photographs and heirlooms, keep your laughter to yourself
Keep your banter and your video games
In safe or in a dungeon
Just make sure they ruin no one’s health

Keep your Prozac and your cauldron, keep your fingertips at bay
Keep your snores and your embrace
Somewhere that’s simple and alone
Or you’ll ****** another Juliet this way

Keep your promises of grandeur, and your sidewalks full of lust
Keep your fire escapes and lonely places
Out of reach
Or all who touch will turn to dust

Keep your valor keep your pseudo-wisdom, put it with your white t-shirts
Keep your childhood and weaponry
Underground safe and sound
Before someone else gets hurt

Keep your lips and teeth and syllables; keep your bookcase safe and strong
Keep your nothingness, keep your beauty
Hide it all behind a mask
Or another lover will have to sing this song
Each time I am leaving home for a trip or a camp, i get quite emotional.
All these thoughts running through my head
What if I dont return
What if i dont see my family again
What if What if What if
There are so many things that sometimes i really wanna say to you
But i can never bring myself to
I dont know how to express all these feelings to you
I am really thankful for whatever you have done for me
The sacrifices you made, the money you spent on me
I appreciate it all and am grateful for it
This week has been a tough week for us all
and it was this week that i realize how bad of a daughter i have been
how i have taken you for granted all this while
how i have forgotten where we actually stand
how much you have and would sacrifice for us
hoow much you love us
your love is the greatest i would ever receive in my entire life
i have so many more things to say
but i have to go now
i will try my very best to be better for you
i will try my best to show my appreciation to you
i have never told you this
but you are the best
and i would never trade anyone for you

and if anything happens, i hope someone show this to them
for i have not shown enough love
and maybe
the only way for them to feel my love
is through my words.
Not a poem though. Always expect the worst, pray for the best.
If i could stop being so lazy and dumb
That would be nice.
Because my dreams are huge
And i am nowhere near it.
For each and every time that i have failed,
I hurt so much
I never really liked to show it
Because its one of my biggest weeakness
Insecurity
Embarrassment.


But there is no one to blame
but me.

When will i ever achieve
Or will i not?
Here is to crying all night because i have failed time and time again. Just wanna die
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