Mr Fix It
The agent sneezed
Another f*cking head cold!
Which **** did he catch it off?
He'd give them their virus back 3x!
Make sure they suffer call it karma
Now he was taking calls in a mask
His voice was muffled and he was irate
Irate agent irate customers wanting help
With their Twinstar electric heaters
Tech support was such fun they said
The customers were American and lazy
Instead of fixing it themselves
They called Tech Support in the manual
He was paid to be chatty and Mr Fix It
Mostly he did ok but now he was mad
His cold clogged his throat and nose
The mask stopped him being clear
It was the perfect ******* storm!
The customers knew it from the get-go
He tried to help but that was it
'TL I'm not well I took my meds.
I'm going home I can't do my shift..."
He was sent home to rest
He only did 3 hours of his shift
And he hated the account
Should he quit entirely?

Like A Book
See how the Fake God and his Wallflower
Sit next to one another at the work’s Xmas party
We all know what comes next later after food
And plenty to drink they honour the tradition
******* till they can’t ***** no more
She likes empowered managers and he likes her
She said to a rep it was his first time joining them all
Yes as he picks the rival account but it’s Xmas
And he wanted to take notes and document
All what goes on for posterity and all that
Managers and the gals they attract
It’s all scripted and never changes
The rep knows the *** will be good
And equally scripted almost like a story
That he wrote long ago guy and gal
Fake God and Wallflower going at it
You know how it is just like a book
Always the same year in year out
As in Bangkok as in Manila

****** Earphones
The black earphones were made in Red China by CCP turtles
They worked for a year giving reasonably good sound
Then the right side stopped working it was totally dead
It was out of guarantee just over one year old
The left side still worked fine with clear sound
That was fine if you were ok with it that way
He wasn’t ok with that not at all he cursed their crap
Nowt but mass produced junk made by slave labour
He listened to three songs tried messing with it
Unplugging them bending the wire increasing the volume
He looked at the wire it appeared fine so what was it?
What exactly was the motherf*cking problem!
His white earphones would do the job he swapped them
Tried a song full volume the sound was at both ears
These had something wrong the frequency range was off!
No vocals came thru just a mass of static with bass
Back to his other black pair he’d listen with his left ear
It was better than garbled sound of no music at all
Both pairs made in Red China by CCP turtles

Same Song
The song is the same on this account
Quite similar to the song on your account
Our beat is different you’ve more bass
The words are the same you relate
A song about a job where all isn’t fine
It was at first then it changed
The reasons don’t matter what does
Is the fact you get it my feelings
My sentiment to the bosses
Who treat us like cannon fodder
Food for the gun cash in his wallet
Way it is in a call centre high attrition
Accounts pull out others get added
Be flexible we are told time and again
Yet dealing with ******* is the same
Different account different date
Same old bosses same excuses
We’ve heard it all before!

Now Different

He once wondered if there was a rep

Who actually wore different coloured footwear?

He wondered this for years a stupid thought

And then there he was a rep in different shoes!

The rep appeared to be a narcissist by image

With one arm fully tattooed and tied back hair

An air of importance surrounded him

He wasn't a manager or boss just a rep

Not necessarily bad or arrogant he was just

Full of self-importance and something else

None of that mattered right now to Brian

What did were the different coloured pumps

One was bright yellow the other was red

Both were the same type of trainers

Not the same pair but the same make

He'd obviously swapped them around

It was the second time he saw him

And each time the rep had worn opposites

He had a quirky thing for opposite shoes

He decided he would write this poem

To remember just another rep now different

19/31
Everybody knew what they both did
After the Xmas party a lot of rumpy pumpy!
The mid-size 31 year old female
And the 19 year old male getting it on
The lad has a galfriend and new baby
But still grinded the older chick
People told me of this and what joy!
They went to a hotel after the drinking
And ******* like rabbits oh illicit heaven!
It was a small Pattaya call centre with 15 workers
All knew and pretended it never happened
The gal flirted with me weeks later
When we all ate out at a fish resto
I fed on meat a different kind that she did!
Was I right now to **** her myself?
I wonder how she'd enjoy me
Would I be better or worse than him?
Captured for posterity in this poem
Does he still want her or msg her
And did they ever do it again?

Tea Biscuits
The call centre rep turned the gal's life upside down
She was state apparatus gal married to a serving cop
The rep was a historical Soviet communist
He called the gal to see how she was his calls were ignored
It came out she fled to her relative away from the city
6 months pregnant by the red rep plus 3 kids with the cop
His calls and texts went thru to the cop did he know who was calling?
The rep the cop threatened to shoot dead for grinding his ex
Now with a lizard in her big fat belly a baby red ****** nipper
How this would enrage the cop who wants to get even and more
How will this all end best friends’ tea and biscuits?
The state apparatus gal with a lizard by a communist agent