he feels sick
and often heavy
his mind is full of sand
he's living in a dream
a reality he cant stand
he scares me with his thoughts
and the conversations in his head
telling me he's happy
but wishing he was dead
i don't understand what goes on in his mind
i'm in love with a mad man
and i'm scared to call him mine

It’s as if everyone knows me
But no one cares to know me
Alone in this crowd

lead me through the darkness
I can't see
All I can do is
trust you have me
But I’m tripped
And i fall
Love isn't blind
But when I love you, I can't see

forgive me
for i am the one you love
for i am one who’s betrayed you
do not forgive me
i deserve it; but I don’t
know
its my fault    
but please
forgive me

blessed green herb
your sent easily reckoned
haze of grey fill the air
spark me once again
take a ****  
inhale the smoke
infiltrate my ribcage
like a dungeon entrap
the perception of your psyche
become who i am
and what i want
temporarily fill the hole
in my being

Im addicted.
I'm addicted to the pain
and I don't understand
when the repercussions equal shame.
Why can't I learn
that my actions have consequences?
That brief moment of bliss
that one little kiss
wasn't worth it in the end.
I betrayed you  
more than once should I add.
I gave myself away
when you're all I've ever wanted
all I've ever had

in this toxic love
i held so close
i gave you the power
to destroy me
to change everything i am
your anger, a beast wielding in your fists
would come out to play
your words lash at my heart
your fists swing and strike
precisely pounding again and again  
leaving me bruised and branded
leaving you crying and in pieces
blinded by love
comforting the man who had just finished beating me