That's not what I meant to say.
I know my words glide through your flesh like a hot knife through soft butter,
But we both know that muscle only bows to a master outside...
That demon that lies sleeping beneath a cavern of insecurity inside my skull
Pledges loyalty to only one master
And you know I don't like to talk about him.

I speak for redemption.
I can't live my life knowing that everyone knows what I am.
Vindicate me so that I can get a moment of sleep and maybe then I won't hate you so much.

Sure, I'd like to crush your teeth out of your head,
But what would that do but send you into swirling fits,
Speaking blasphemous truths through your gums, beating?

Say you forgive me.
I deserve it.
I need it and you know you need it.
Quid pro quo.
Let me hurt you so you can forgive me.
Vindicate me.
You need to forgive like I need forgiveness.

I remember the evening
that we sat clinging
to paper cups
of coffee gone cold

over secrets spilled and memories told
two bodies cursed
with hearts grown old

behind your eyes
I found new worlds
A winding road stretched out for miles
to a small cafe at the end of the isle

Sweet pastries filled the mouths
of those who sat beside us
and stayed for a while.

How the hours went by,
people just passing through
The descending sun ending
a forever with you.

Have I already told you?
that I always miss you
on a day to day basis

Have I already told you?
that I want to hold you
in this cold, lonely night

Have I already told you?
that you're all I see
in this myriad crowd

Have I already told you?
how you look so cute
when you wear that smile

Have I already told you?
that I'm slowly falling
out of love; it's driving me crazy

Have I already told you?
how lucky I am that I've found you
my one and only comfort zone

Have I already told you?
that I'm hurt with words you've said
I thought it was me all along.

But, I was wrong.
that's why I didn't tell you
what I feel about you.

Have I already told you?
how lucky that person is
to be loved by you...

And the
birth of the
morning in
your eyes,

and the
still of
our heart
beats
timing into
one.

love has
left
you,
to find
you again.

it is
no longer
then
it is only
now.

like broken
sheets
of snow
upon a
river,

remembering not
the harshness
of the
frozen cold

or stagnant

winter,

or the
falling
of gentle
rain
upon your
face that
remembers
not the
death of
broken
dreams

everything
is new.

and the
love you
give is
his universe
and the
pillow
you rest
your head
upon will
be his
dreams,

and you
will wear
one another
like pieces
of God's
tailored
clothing.

and to
anyone
else it
would not
fit.

it would
not give
warmth.

but only
the fleeting
glimpse of
what love

was meant
to be.

And in the end,
The Sunrise turns into Dusk,
Dusk turns into Moonlight,
And when The Moonlight disappear,
Should I love this darkness so that it will last forever?

Stumbling over emotions I thought I'd never feel
Not knowing which way I'm going
Or if it's even real
Heart beat so fast like a hi hat
Slinking through the dark like a black cat
I should've known better but I couldn't help it
I wanted you

Billowing dark clouds rolling in
Tears streaming down like rain on my skin
Didn't wanna ever have to feel again
Heart slowing down like depression
I don't think I'll ever learn my lesson
I'd give it all up just to keep
one more night with you fast asleep
I need you

I can't tell you what I want to say
You'd only think I'd get in your way
And it wouldn't be long before I'm me again, crazy, crying over nothing
Jealous, fighting, sneaking and lying, always blaming you for something but...
I think I love you

Lost in my mind,
I often seem to wonder
About the battle I've left behind
Lord knows why I ponder

I have this dream
It happens to feel so serene
like the consistency of freshly whipped cream
Yet I am in constant need of caffeine

Now you might not understand, why the caffeine
But trust me it takes a lot to handle the defeat
I ain't sure if my heart is even keen
To re-open a chapter of my life that's always been so discreet

I bet if my remains were 6ft under
You might have taken my story a little serious
Maybe I'll just take the refund
Before you think I'm being hilarious

Hilarious for trying to make you understand my pain and misfortune
Everyday feels like I'm hanging on a strand
Cause I'm losing my mind from all this exhaustion
But don't worry about me, maybe soon I'll be amidst some ashes & sand