I dreamed a dream that could never be true
and yet I still stayed up waiting for you
though why my heart held on to you
is something I will never know.

and though my heart cries out for things
I know will never be,
I still dream a hopeless dream
of us, of you and me.

I lay awake in bed holding my breath
grippin the sheets feeling close to death
Dreamin a world without you will have me feeling helpless and worthless less of a human being.

You make me better
I wish I known you sooner, I woulda never had let you get hurt,
having ya feelings growin in dirt,
like other losers.
on my knees tellin beggers cant be choosers,
on my knees with a promise ring tellin at least my love wont bruise ya.

Cause people took you for granted,
but no longer will you need a fistt,
all will you need is your lips cause ima have your hand in something to be,
future maybe?? Have another baby?
its crazy but thats life, when you pushin up daisy.

Mamita im lazy,
but my heart is not, it stands on two feet while holding its own just like you baby, it wants you as its crown.
So you can be held on top.
On top of my world and on my mind,
cause thats where you are in reality almost all the time.

Pardon my feelings that grow ahead of time, pass the ceilin thats just life on a heart monitor,
always on a thin line, cause you take  my breath away , barly breathin.

So dont mind my-
my sweet Dear, i only fear for for my heart to be taken or mistaken for something its not so I reveal my soul to you, cause thats all i got,
you on my mind alot and i think?
see I cant stop!
I dont know why? Ima hot head , with you in my mind im hot
in the skys like a star that been shot,
and the heat is commin,the hots for you have me burnin,

and im alil concernin i hope im not being played cause then  from this will, you defeat its purpose, and ima be back at square one again,
feeling worthless,
i open my self ahead of time,
so i pull open the close curtains so,
you can see thru my eyes in time you will know for certain,
that i am the realist! but i am not all perfect,
im just ahead of the curve like script cursive.

By: Emmmanuel jv Hernandez
7/6/13

**** this stupid game.
It's always the same.
We don't talk for a month or so, come back, and it's like you never left,
like you never changed.
You think I don't notice but I do.
I think about you every single day, religiously.
And I'm left wondering why it is you called in the first place.
Because you could just forget about me, leave me to live my own life
You could just let me forget about you, eventually I could, if I tried.
Instead you let me believe I've moved on from you and then suddenly
You.
You call.
Again.
I hear your voice.
It's like a signal
A signal to my heartstrings
Wait! don't let him go! they scream at me.
Please, he needs you! they plead with me.
I listen, because how can I ignore a cry for help?
I fall right back to where I was
I land on my face.
Who cares? Not you, not me.
****.
I love you, but you don't love me.
You should have just left me alone because now I'm back and this whole thing is just
****.
Here we go again.
This emotional coaster you've put me on
were you planning on letting me off?
Ever?

When im gone, and no longer there to hold you when you crying.Maybe then you'll realize that you was the one lying,  and im done! don't bother even  trying.Rain of pain tears are falling,  and my heart is cold  your love is calling?
so I hang up!
cause your full of it, no more love falling, cause im through with it.

I could've been there as your man, but now thinking of it, I cant stand.
And as for this stranger in this strange land, this strange man, and this real man, will meet who is now a heartless dead man.
Only only one will be on his feet, and its this man.

but in the end!
Back to you, and how you did me wrong,I get it.
You played me the whole time, and in my presence you don't belong.
Now that the hand has turned, and my patience with you has been wasted.
time with you is gone,but theres a closure that I can never face it.

I cant believe it, how nieve I was!
Its the truth, your pathetic its pittyful too
and I regret it, all that i did for you.
Your no longer a memory or a fantasy.
What Ive made you is all deciessed-full,in my heart.
You an art that shouldnt live, be punished for what you did, and let me be once rewarded for all that I've give.

So I leave you this letter, more of a promiss.
That life could take better care of me rather than you, from what you promissed.
So lets be honest, you never had a thing for me, but I did for you.
Quess thats wasnt enough to keep me too.
So "bye bye!", Im tired! Im gone!
When you ask were I went,
just listen to this song.
My pain is written in these lines, now start reading!
If you really did care for me then make wounds in thought of me, and start bleeding.
So I can live off your pain, and laugh myself to sleep.
knowing your stupid, and deceitful actions lead you to lossing me.
You blame everything but yourself as if its not clear to see.
One will not prove there mistakes, but some are open spokenley.
And your not one.

I hope this letter rotts your insides,
make your eyes burn from tears as if it was from rays of the burning sun,
and let your lips dry.
Cause no one will ever kiss you like I will,
not no guy hunn!
The only real thing in your life has just been killed.
I bet your not thrilled, to see me smile, but behind it, its anger filled.
Im strong willed, but at times I cant help but think your heart was born still.
"Us" did happen too fast, now the thoughts of you is just those of my past.
I'll still keep you in my broken heart,suffocating in a caste.
So your love can die,
as I give you a taste of you own trash.
Let it known, my heart beats with no rhythm.
From what you said and what I've known baby your unforgiven. I.I know It wont hurt you as it hurts me, but I rather let you know, that I rather be thirsty than drink your love, why? because your cursed see?
you told me lies to hypnotized me, I saw love but I felt it blindly.
false image of love, is  what you remind me, and im this song, you play this, now rewind me.These lyrics are clear, like my head is now, open mindly.
Able to co-exist with my heart, now before I can love again I wouldn't have to tear it apart.

By:Emmanuel jv Hernandez
Created 12-10-11
pefected 2-22-12