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 Oct 2017 Jad Ghamloush
Q
The Last
 Oct 2017 Jad Ghamloush
Q
This is the last thing I write with you in mind
You thought I've been writing for you
I don't write for those who need my time
Only when it best suits them to.

This will remain short and sweet, I've no energy to rant
This will remain a reminder not to continually reach out a hand
This will remain a stamp of me feeling closer than ever to done
This will remain exactly what it is, a poem for you: the last one.
Forever burns day by day
As I try to find my way
As I try to run from you
And find the only moon
But there is no running away
Not a chance I can escape
For you trapped my heart and brain
And threw the keys in Hell's depths...
 
Forever burns me day by day...
 
That firefly that I see flies away
And I try to hurry behind
For I fear to make myself suffer
For I seek to never hear you mutter
The light that shone burns out today
And the warm eyes that hurt me
I kneel before them and pray
As I can barely make myself breathe...
 
Forever burns me day by day...
 
You whisper those deadly words
And touch my heart with burning desire
As I collapse in Hell that you call home
I can barely see the sweetest smile
Raise me up in the skies closer to you
Lift me higher than the stars
And watch me fall as you breathe to me
The final words of the spell you've cast on me...
 
Your love burns my existence day and day...
Burning―a hot blaze
In the manner of fire.
Flickering in the form
Of ignited passion,
It dwindles in the
Morning sky.

I admire the beauty
From afar, for if I gazed
Straight ahead into the
Magnificent light,
My sight shall be
No more.

Wandering, my thoughts
Haunted me day
And night.
What if the light was
No more
And the world lived
In eternal darkness?

Who would be to save
Our beloved
Skies from going
Utterly blank?

There must be a savior;
Someone with power
And courage willing
To set fire to the
Sun to
Save our souls from
Flickering away
With the
Winds of time.
An aesthetic piece for the soul.
 Feb 2017 Jad Ghamloush
Riot
I was hoping you would see me off
I was hoping you would say goodbye
I was hoping you would take the time
To wish me luck before I took the sky
I still have a bag that reads your name
Just in case you wanna stop on by
I was hoping you would see me off
I was hoping you would be that guy

I still write about you every time
I want to think about the past
I still see your face on the reasons and examples
Exactly why love will never last
You broke me

I still put a band-aid on the wounds
I still fear the day I tell the truth
I still think about the day I packed my bags and left
The day the sky revealed my father wasn't you
Emotionally

Though you tried with all your might
And it might not be alright to bring you down
But hold me
Accountable
I thought long and hard and now I know
Sometimes the only father you have is in the sky

But I was hoping you would see me off
I was hoping you would say goodbye
I was hoping you would say those words
*But I know you’ll never be that guy
I'm not gonna stress him anymore. He's not my father
The walls of my destiny, they fall apart
By her run into the ark, into the dark
And I fall so alone, shivering all an' all
And a him, again a him; am I betrayed another time?
But she calls and she lies I know
So she warns “You should not take it wrong"
It’s a meeting in a bar like the old mates go there all
And I die as I find the whys; the lies
And the sighs; they fill the nights
And I glide shedding the lights!
So there they are hidden; behind the shames of eyes!
Dressing up their nasty crimes!
You said "Pull, and don't stop pulling until I tell you to."
I knew this was where my training as a wind breather was going to pay off.
I expelled all nitrogen, carbon dioxide, and oxygen from my alveoli
And pulled.

I pulled and I looked at you,
Staring at me.
I deconstructed your face, your hair, your teeth, your eyes, your clothes, your life.
I deconstructed your Mexico and what you did to my friend.
I deconstructed the cigarettes you and your brother bummed off of me.
I tore you apart.
Organism, *****, tissue, cell, organelle, molecule, atom, electrons protons and neutrons.

I couldn't pull any longer.
I don't know if you knew I couldn't,
Or simply determined I was set.
"Okay, stop."

I couldn't breathe out. I couldn't breathe in.
I was suffocating.
She put poison in my lungs and my body is dying.
Water.
Water.
It stops.
I can breathe.

My lungs recoil and I can see straight.

She poisoned me but I love her.
 Feb 2017 Jad Ghamloush
Liz
When I first met love
It took me in its arm
And twirled me into a world
Where I could no longer
Be okay with loneliness.
It dropped me in the dust.

I was a foreigner here.
The only reality I knew before
Love left me stranded
Was dark and quiet,
Comfortable and terminal.

I was bound to fade away
And my time was almost up
When Love ripped me
From my grave
And ****** me into
Its strange world.

Here,
I settled into
My tragic fortune.
Waiting for Love
To dance with me again.

Our first dance
Was too furious to survive.
Love tossed me
Like a ragdoll
And spun me so fast
My head nearly
Detached from my body.
Love went for the lift
And dropped me on my face.

The second time
Love took me by the hand
It's gentle swaying
Almost made me forget
About our first disaster.
Softly, Love turned me around.
I turned once,
I turned twice,
Lost in rhythm I closed my eyes.

Now Love turned me again
And when I opened my eyes
Expecting to greet the face
That hypnotized me,
Love was unfamiliar.
Distorted and cruel,
Love changed to Narcissism
And left me in the dust again.

One more time
Love asked me to dance.
And I said,
"Stay away from me.
I won't fall for it again."
So Love shrugged and
Began to waltz without me.

I watched in disbelief
As Love moved
With a new kind of grace
And fluidity.
It didn't need me
To create such beauty.
But with patience,
Love waited for me.

So I stepped in
And Love let me lead.
Love bent with me
And caught me
When I dipped.

It seems
All we needed
Was the right music.
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