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  Jul 2014 Angelica Colon
Chloe
Being thin
is not going
to fix you,
because no matter
the number
on the scale,
you will still
call me at 3am,
begging for a
reason to live.
  Jul 2014 Angelica Colon
cr
to the girl who wrote me asking
me for advice at four o'clock in the
morning when her brain was high
off of an ashy heart: stop
******* around with toxins, and
no, i don't mean the drugs
turning your life into
unwholesome chaos. i mean
your ******* friends who told
you that
your problems are nothing
your demons are nothing
you are nothing. stop
it. you're better than
them.

to the friend who asked
for advice on how to turn
herself into a walking
skeleton: get over
yourself. anorexia and
bulimia will not fill
some hole in your tragic
past, they will ravage everything
good in you until you
are nothing but the flesh
you have despised. do
not ask me how to "become
an anorexic" because all you
are asking me is how
to die.

to the boy who i have
dedicated so many poems
to: god, you are so oblivious
to everything. to the soulless
"i love you"s spoken out of
pity, to the feigned grins, to
the fact that you are ripping
me apart. i was always told
to not love someone
who was sad because they would
drag me to the pit of the ocean
with them, and i should
have listened. there isn't
enough of me left
to share.
sometimes you can't help sad people because you're going down the same path.
  Jul 2014 Angelica Colon
Kay
well ****

I finally stopped crying

I may have spent a lot my time stumbling to stand and drunk texting all his friends
but I was happier than I've ever been

you came into my life for barely 2 months
and now I'm back into the same sadness it took me almost 6 months to get out of

I'm tired of feeling angry
shouting stupid words i don't mean

you can't calm me down
not this time

i changed for you
but you changed me for the worst

I feel empty
the only thing I feel are the tears rushing down my cheeks
and the ache in my throat after shouting
sometimes I even feel the blood rushing down my hand after picking up the glass

I fell in love,
again

I must admit
I didn't think it was possible

but once I met you I know it would be inevitable to fall in love with you

I am once again drowning in sadness and regret
I am drowning in my own tears

I can't take it

I got through a heart break once
I can do it again, right?

you love me?
then please, let me go
  Jul 2014 Angelica Colon
ln
And
every
breath
I
inhaled
and
exhaled,

tasted
like
you
.
Angelica Colon Jul 2014
I remember how fast it went.
how everything changed when I started to fall for you.
I think it was a Tuesday that I first realized that I wanted to be around you more
it was the next Wednesday that I realized  liked you.
a month later I thought I was in love
in a year you made crash in burn in depths of the earth
you made me cry
you made me laugh
and to this day I still say your name when I'm thinking about him
its scary how similar you guys are
but you
you were completely different from everyone else
you made me feel different
and that scares me to the depths of my soul.
because you were my biggest regret and my hardest fall.
and you never once said I'm sorry..
Since I never got to say one to your face.

— The End —