Sometimes, even though I have nothing to say, I just need to write

To write is to give voice to the permanent unrest lurking beneath the surface
And to let it all out brings peace
Momentary, fleeting peace
But for those moments my mind is quiet
My heart stops pounding out the rhythm of its discontent
My gut stops churning out reminders of all the times I ignored it, although I knew better..
And I *breathe - not just because I have to but because I want to..

Don't let the revolving doors get more accomplished than you
Move faster than the speed of light
Well, as much as physically possible
Because going at that speed is impossible
Where were was i going with this again?

we confuse wishes with reality

and we confuse reality with dreams

we confuse dreams with what is

and we confuse what is with desire

we confuse desire with truth

and we confuse truth with fantasy

we confuse fantasy with certainty

if nothing is certain

how can we fantasize

if we don't know the truth

how can we desire

if we don't know what is

how can we dream

if we don't know reality

how can we wish

i love you my sweet friend
and will always
until all of my days end

while you explore the world
please stay safe
and may I still be your favorite girl

i pray you find what you search for
go far and wide
express your passion, be more

live your life the way you planned
just don't forget about me
you'll have my soul safe in your hand

i will be there when you marry
may it not be me?
yet in your arms, my heart, you carry

she will love you, much more than i
but please remember me
when struggles arise, for you i'll cry

explain to her, let her be understanding
about my love for you
our relationship long lasting

when we've both grown old
may you think of me
my friend not of silver, but gold

i love you my sweet friend
and will always
until all of my days end

You did not complete me, you destroyed me.

You did not help me, you watched me struggle.

You did not trust me, you doubted me.

You did not believe in me, you broke me down.

You did not hold me, you pushed me away.

You did not care for me, you put up with me.

You did not love me, you lusted after me.

The way you have made me feel was nothing short of spectacular,
Miraculous,
Beautiful,
Just from your gaze.
One kiss from you had me mad for more.
One conversation and I was hooked on you.

Although the time we have spent together so far
Has changed us quite a lot,
I still find myself thanking the universe every time we get to talk on the phone,
No matter how ordinary the topics were or how short the call was.
I am still hooked on the memories, daydreams, and wishes to be with you.

But Lord Almighty,
Or whoever else shall rule the deep blue sky of night,
Tell me this isn't some cruel cosmic joke.
Promise me this is true and I've found my other half,
Because if this is all just a phase to end on a dime,
I surely won't know what to do
With the overwhelming emotions that shall surround me,
Engulfing me entirely.

I hope not.