4am, why am i so angry?
the usual mistake of thinking i want to die when in reality i just want to curl up and stick my head into his rib cage,
blink with his beating heart,
rest for a while and come back ready
to take on each day,
a little extra protection

i'm getting a headache from exhaustion (?)
come kiss me
come kiss me
come kiss me
i miss you already
i think i miss you the most
your touch the most familiar
your smile the one i longed to smile with since all my teeth grew in

i miss you
steady guitar riff in a loop
tucked behind my ear
you trace your fingers there
i fall asleep with a smile

The water drips down the faucet
thirsty for speech
Molly misfit doesn't speak a word
but she's clever when disturbed
round and round you will go
All the pretty colors wild and free
describing your senses, absent sleep
some things take hold, making you feel bold
get your creativity flowing, racing, while it makes no sense
you feel the rhythm in every inch
and you explore the depths of normality in a insane way
because things seem different, but it's you.
You're never same, constant change, feeling overjoyed racing away
Like you found yourself on Molly's ride, but learn to much to fast
You're no longer trapped, you are free, to breathe and be serene
I found you, and you found me. In each other we find one another, because we are alike you and me. We just believe in a different destiny, under the same wing of Molly's side, share the warmth she provide. Hours pass, feeling good feeling great, hopefully the morning won't be a mistake, after we get our way, wanting this feeling to stay, my heart knows a good feeling, allowing us to be comfortable here in the now, ******* will need to suffice as the term of how it feels to be alive, right here right now, I'm happy, touched by love, and kissed from above, heaven is here, on your skin, it's good, not sin. Finally everything makes sense, contentment sweeping over me, enjoy Molly's gift while it last, just be glad it was a blast, and remember how it felt, from start to end, what I know now can't be replaced, an unforgettable experience, i cannot forget, reminding me to look out for you, and you for me, even when the end is near, we won't forget or fear, when the magic burns out, and we had a taste, just know that together we found this place, our discovery, beautiful sane insanity, a needed escape, the great sensations and positive vibes, trust and happiness for you and me, will always be awaiting my return, I earned the secret, of reality, no need to hide my changing mind, set it free, be real with me, hiding from the truth, the remedy, but here i've found the key to serenity.

spinning colours.
flashing lights.
pounding music.
rooms too bright.

tucked away amidst the dawn,
he took a drag on Mary Jane,
coating her in liquor rain,
as he thought of thought of lustful times forgone.

he sat the pill right on his tongue,
and watched it melt away.
he closed his eyes and swallowed vulgarly,
for there was no time to be a saint this day.

he hid within an acid storm.
and his promises were holy,
when he watched the load drip down slowly.
for the psychedelic pleasure held him warm.

you planted trees down my worries—
grew love in all of the places i was
too afraid to shine
and now a forest grows in all of
the corners your fingers got to know
and magic leaves are dancing to your breeze

someone once told me that curiosity kills the cat
and yeah maybe when you first smiled at me
i wondered where you had been my whole life

and i think that's where we went wrong

just like the nights you spent telling me words
in the way your language speaks them
while i spent all of my belief
on the movement of your mouth
being the key to my soul’s wildest dreams

but magic is made up of tricks

and you sure are the master at making me think the trees from your seeds were real
but lately the plastic leave have melted
from the fire you had rekindled in my heart

but even if the words weren't true
you gave me something bright and new
and i know we all are trying to be
the best versions of these humans beings
so i don't blame you
for being what you came here to be
because really i chose you
to come do these things to my heart
i prayed and hoped my way to manifesting you
to be there when i looked up from my lonely hands

but my god

if only you hadn't come into work that night
if only i hadn’t stumbled to that side of the beach
to that side of the planet
if only i had done one thing differently in my past
maybe just maybe then
i wouldn’t have fallen into the arms of lost hope
and maybe we would have never known
that magic could exist in strangers
that love can be felt at first sight
and everything occurring now
would feel real

but instead
i am walking through some kind of lucid dream
and i can't figure out what my room
used to feel like
because now it looks so unfamiliar to me
just like the person i am

i can't find her

what did you do when i looked up at you
some kind of unkind love spell
i just want to be free...

i want you

but you don't have the room
for someone like me

The first night you didn’t tell me you love me,
I cried into my pillow,
Desperate to make no sound.
I cried myself to sleep,
Tears seeping into my dreams.
I cried in every thought,
Seeing you, touching you, hearing you in every room I tried to escape.
I cried when I woke up,
Because you were not next to me.
Because even if you were,
I love you,
And you do not love me.

you wish to buy my meat.
the butcher's cut is ripe and cheap;
a fresh-faced lamb of london streets
and everybody craves a piece.

*******. ribs. thighs.
money is no issue and they'll all see you gloat:
"my spread-eagled angel will be gnawed down to bone."
(god knows there's no heart in the matter.)

you wish to play the maggot.
you want your prey half-dead.
my flesh rots and decays on your tongue,
bloodied on the slab of your mattress.