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 Dec 2014
Phoenix Rising
"I've been scraped back up so many times that I am finally in the raw.  It's a little funny-sad how it took all these past mishappenings with other people for you to be blessed with the best version of myself.  I guess finishing last is a good thing, huh? Now, I have experienced a lot of events in this short lifetime of mine and I have figured out something about this world. It's a little tough and it won't ever wait for me- or you- or anyone. But,  I have found a secret to surviving this big world. Be impulsive. Let's leave, let's do what we want, let's not care about every day ideas. Let's be selfish, together. I love you more than the air. Let's live until we can't." - Stephanie Darcey

"Stephanie Darcey, what a hell of a girl. She was something different, like the girls you dreamed of bein' with who were from movies and such.  There was so much to her, she never ran out of words to speak. I don't know how many times I had to stop her mid sentence, because if I hadn't I would of been sitting in my own silence all night. But, boy, I sure loved that 'bout her.  She looked like she was born yesterday, and I mean in a good way. Not the kind of way you'd usually think.  I mean, she looked like she saw the world for the first time every *single
day. A twinkle in her eye, yep.  Steph wasn't insecure either, and if she was... Well, she was real good at hiding it.  I am not quite sure how she did it, but I think she actually achieved perfection.  She did nothing wrong to me.  She wasn't submissive, but she wasn't wanting me to cater to her every beck and call.  She had balance, and I think she was a lot more beautiful than the girls on the T.V.  I loved her so much and I still do. Steph was untamable. So, what did I do? What any man would do if he was madly in love. I went with her, we went everywhere. We experienced what life was to us. She was getting lost in jungles while I was getting lost in her."
 Dec 2014
Phoenix Rising
Your heart is made of silicone
I know, because it bends and changes form
I shake and I tremble
Because I don't know if you'll love me tomorrow

Your head is made of marble
I know, because it's hard and chiseled a newly mood
I shake and I tremble
Because I don't know if you'll remember me tomorrow

Your eyes are made of rollers
I know, because you never look at me for too long
I shake and I tremble
Because I don't know if you'll find me beautiful tomorrow

Your feet are made of amphetamines
I know, because you always walk away and around
I shake and I tremble
Because I don't know if you'll be here when I wake up tomorrow
 Dec 2014
DC raw love
Deceiving eyes they tell a tale

Of something they hide
Of something to sell

The lies you tell, to make things right
Makes life thin and nothing seems right

The lies you told and the lies you’ll tell
You must come clean and make it right

You say you’ll tell no one
But one person knows

The things that ya’ll know
Is something ya’ll hold

Your deceiving eyes tell so many lies
So keep up your ways and continue your lies
 Dec 2014
-Ben-
i like you
for everything that was
i love you
for what you are
i need you
for everything that comes
 Dec 2014
Onoma
Aureole...Manna's descent like showering
waveforms.
Eyes hungering...upturned, cloven in rapture.
Mouth slants open in a salivary click--
come the incantations...come the
anatomical sway of microcosm.
Intergalactic cynosure, pariah, shaman--
mangy interloper teaching wind to dance!
Tamer of the subconscious...mender of schism!
Anathema to Gaia's Satanic Stewards!
To be sought in the House of Aquarius,
haunting its foundation that it may uphold.
The roads to and fro are as anagrams that
alter with the perceiver.
It is the second look, of what's cross with
what Is...and ever shall be--that gives rise
to disorientation...reincarnation.
O grant dancer of self-evidence, grant your
sundry incantations... yearning for Gaia's heart
of hearts.
 Dec 2014
Onoma
All suffering
is valley to
joyous peak.
Recall suffering
halfway to peak...
recall joy
halfway to valley.
 Dec 2014
Juneau
Descending December
the sun fades to its last burning ember
distant days of August we vaguely remember
with food running low from the harvests in September
can we hunt enough to feed each and every member

how many will we lose within our little commune
and to think there's still two months until the Hunger Moon

Magnificent May
I ask for you and begin to pray
bring to us your warmth and lengthen the day
for I fear we can no longer survive in this way
we've already lost great numbers leaving my people in dismay

The howls roll in from the hills and I feel like a complete buffoon
did I truly believe this prayer could hold off the Wolf's Moon
December 2nd, 2014

A story.

thirty-six
 Nov 2014
axr
Think happy thoughts
Think happy thoughts
Think happy thoughts*
she told herself over and over again
as she descended into the abyss of darkness
 Nov 2014
axr
'Do you accept her as your lawfully wedded wife?'
'I do'
'Do you accept him as your lawfully wedded husband?'
'I do'
Now, pour the champagne!  
Watch the couple dance
Get drunk till no one's to be blamed
What a beautiful wedding it is!
They well spend the rest of their lives together
Beautiful forever
Shh.. We all know about their exes
Their decisions made in vain
But it's okay
They won't break a vow
or point out flaws
Let's find the profound
Dance to the blaring sound
Happy ever afters may not exist
Shh..It's time for them to kiss!
Lies on top of lies
We'll dance whilst they fight
Questioning intentions
and other confusions
Little by little
All these vows they break
Point out the flaws
which they embraced
Showing their true faces
Their souls bare naked
Struck by the pain of infidelity
Driven to insanity
Run for your lives!
Their anger has set the chapel on fire!
pretty white dress turning to  ashes
His jaw tightened
Lump in their throats
Words unspoken
Promises broken
With trembling lips he said
"I don’t love any more.
I hope you understand this.
I want a divorce. "
The bride wasn't everything the groom desired
If they loved each other
They're in a castle
with flickering candles
So yeah..its about a failed marriage
 Nov 2014
axr
Everytime I look at you,

My heart skips a beat.

In this lost city of dreams,

we are the ones who roam here without a clue.

It's weird how we never talked

but now we stay up every night

Hoping to see each other's face in the light,

and watch you hold my heart which you caught.

Let's light this place with the fire in our eyes

We are lost birds but yet we continue to fly.

The spark of rebellion inside us refuses to fade.

Go ahead and try,

We will never be trapped in chains.

Maybe someday we might forget how we used to be

begging to the cold hearted for mercy.

Memories of yesterday will live on in our minds,

we vowed to change the world

and never pick up a fight.

So here's to us and promises to last forever,

it may take us a while

but we will escape from this glimmer.
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