Fat, ugly, and unloved.
You need to go puke in the toilet.
Continue puking in the toilet, ugly *****.
Because you really are not that slim.
Only drink coffee.
No food for you today.
Starving yourself everyday will for sure keep the fat away
Stupid *****, continue to excersise.
You must look perfect before you die.

0 is only possible with water
1 sadly isn't possible and won't satisfy
13 is equivalent to that of an unappetizing snack
300 is starting to border between satisfying and too much
500 is a little out there
1,000 is unsatisfactory
2,000 is toilet time

Burn my throat as I swallow the same air
Here we are choking on laughter that's grown stale
Don't let me cry out -- no -- don't let me cry out
Apart from this madness perhaps we'll find clarity
Rip off my arms and keep them for your lonesome self
How much good do empty words do us anyway
When you wake up remember I'm done waiting
Poison I've injected into your eyes and hands
Hopefully you can stay subdued and ignorant
You'll miss the parts where I'm on the floor
Gasping for air and nearly lifeless as I'm convulsing
We can smile about the times we bled into each other

prettier than me
i can see what you mean
with her striking blue eyes
it's no surprise
mine are brown
and don't make you drown
prettier than me
shorter and cute
not this awkward height
too short or too tall
she can make you laugh
i don't do much laughing lately
how grand it is
she actually has a personality
and i'm merely just
me

He said my eyes were intense;
He said I scared him...
But I know they are intense.
I know that I'm fierce.
They do follow you,
they look intense at you
like a Monalisa stare,
throwing hot insence
and daggers into your chest.
They make you reach, hold your breath,
pause and sight.
I have seeing it well...
But why do you fear my eyer.
Maybe because my glanze can read your soul
and turn you into a better man.

Why did you eat that?
Don't you know
You're already fat?

Everyone is staring,
At the way your skin
Is swelled and sagging.

No one wants you,
With all that extra cargo
You look 200 pounds.

Put the food down
And go for a run --
You look disgusting.

Why did you eat that?
Don't you know
You're already fat?

I will be perfect. Is what she says in her mind before her dinner is all over the toilet floor. I will be perfect is what she says while skipping a meal or two. No thank you is what she says to an innocent candy offered to her. As her boyfriend kisses her and says "you're perfect" she is only thinking about the sudden urge of being thin. That with time it isnt so sudden anymore. She wants to be wraped around his arms with ease. She looks down at the scale and cries. 126.3 pounds of shame. She could lose it all and still be full of loneliness. Her smile is magnificent. Who will ever see her fear? Every scar on her wrist is a reminder of what she will never be. Perfect. Its funny how no one will understand how much time it took for her to get so empty she hurts herself in desire to be beautifully perfect.

She offered me chocolate
she had brought home from work-
I lashed out
and shouted my decline,
slammed the door
and cried,
screaming into my pillow.

I'm still going to pretend
that this isn't taking over my life.