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 Jun 2019
Her
My name is Erin
and i was *****
at the age of 7

it has taken me
14 years of my life
for those 13 words to escape
my hollow mouth

the only questions i come to now
is why
why lock me in that room
why take everything from me
my innocence
my purity
my childhood

in that room
where my family trusted you
where i trusted you
the night terrors i have to this day
still haunt my mind

like a never ending
drive in movie that plays
over
and
over
only the moon in the night sky
isnt made to be found here
there is no light in these terrors

i cant sleep this time of year
because every time i do
its you
in that room
locking the door
shutting the windows
******* me
yelling at me
every single night
i close my eyes

it has taken me 14 years
to accept the fact that i was taken by you
i have been numb ever since
left in the dust
rotting away at the core
thinking i was nothing
thinking i deserved nothing
because you took everything

but not anymore
i will recover from this
i am strong enough
i believe in myself
i believe in my own happiness
and i promsie
that when i have children one day
i will never ever let them rot at the core
i will find happiness
the darkness will not take over this time
 Jun 2019
Emily Miller
My father walked me down the aisle,
But my mother held my arm.
He went with me,
But we went not towards the altar,
But towards the door.

My father walked me down the aisle,
And the ***** rang through the church,
Humming through the elaborate crown molding,
Carved by my ancestors.

He went,
Not beside me,
But before me,
And I watched,
As he was illuminated by the bright,
Overbearing,
Texas sun.

My father walked me down the aisle,
But I did not wear white.
My father walked me in silence,
And I shed tears not for a man standing at the altar,
But for the one I would never see again.

My father walked me down the aisle,
And no veil obscured my face.
All eyes were upon me, but not for my pristine beauty,
Instead for my clenched jaw and furrowed brow,
Severe and fierce to distract from my glassy eyes.

My father did not leave me at the end of our walk to sit beside my mother.
She clung to me for support and sobbed breathlessly,
Loudly,
Unavoidably,
And I carried her with one hand,
My sister the other,
And walked towards my future.
A future family,
Not one person more,
But one person less.
I walked,
One final time,
With him.

My father walked me down the aisle,
And I will never forget it.
Hundreds of eyes isolating my family from the crowd,
Slow and muffled sounds drowning in the deafening beat of my heart,
Blurred faces staring,
Black heels clacking against the cobbled path from the church,
The anguished wails of my mother,
The whimpering of my sister,
And the wooden box that glided before us,
Pulling,
A string tied to our patriarch,
The pin key of our family,
Pulled taut and then snipped with the slam of the hearse doors.

My father walked me down the aisle,
Before I had a chance to grow up.
He walked me,
Out of the church,
Away from the altar,
Never to be walked again.
 Jun 2019
Nolan Bucsis
Depressed.

I'm always depressed and punishing myself for not being well adjusted.
And, I'm always hungry and overthinking.

This oh so familiar ennui.
My isolation.
My grand delusions.
Are really just the most effective time waster I know.

This is all just some strange daze.
Some kinda washed out broken device I can't fix.

My misanthropy has made me give up as all I long for.

Is.
Sweet.
Release.
 Jun 2019
Ike
I can't breathe
Yes you can....just do it
Focus on it
Slow...
I CAN NOT
My fingers are numb...
My lips aren't there
Oh my god
am I having a heart attack
Or falling out of a nightmare
Only to wake up to a vast nothingness
splashing cold water on my face
For seventy two hours
Even the air around me is blankly staring into my soul
I'm wearing clothing made out of arachnids
Or some other major phobia
Crawling over my skin.
I can't stop shaking
STOP TELLING ME IT WILL BE OK
IT WONT
I'm so weird and broken
No you're not
YES I AM AND I WILL NEVER BE UNBROKEN
DEAL WITH IT
Wait....what was I saying?
I can't tell if I'm going to cry or *****
Knots in my stomach...
Knives.
STOP LOOKING AT ME!
Did I just say that?
How can I not be having a heart attack I can't feel my arms
You have a pulse idiot.
WELL SOMETHING IS VERY WRONG AND I CAN'T EXPLAIN IT.
My whole life turned into a horrible mistake just now!
What have I DONE!?
It's fine! You're doing so much better...
STOP TELLING ME ITS FINE.
How can I expect you to understand. How could you?

I am you.

Oh no...
Sorry people I was having a "moment"
I'm not sorry....
I'm terrified
 Jun 2019
Ike
I hate love my life so much
I wish it would just end go on infinite
If my entire life has been torture
My entire life has been beauty
Every waking moment pain bliss sleep
I can can't decipher or begin to explain
Yet I am forty eight words in.
Forever to end beginning tomorrow
I love with all my heart
I am dead inside.
 Jun 2019
M
You're not ******* winning. No one wins.
 Jun 2019
NoPoe
I was taught
That my voice
Would never be loud enough
To speak
So I stay
With rope in my throat
Keeping me silent
 Jun 2019
juno
it's okay to be aro.

love your friends.

love your family.


because we don't feel anything more than that.




im sorry.
 Jun 2019
Unknown
My Teenage years;
Teenage years with people saying 'sit down and shut up'
Teenage years with no one caring
Teenage years with physical abuse
Teenage years with razor blades
Teenage years with no mother
Teenage years with bottles of pills
Teenage years with ****** assualt
Teenage years with suicide attempts
Teenage years with no reason to live
Teenage years spent pining for what was lost.



© Copyright Tyler Atherton
 May 2019
juno
why can't they leave you alone?
they have other friends so why do they have to take you from me?

i.. i love you.. but, they.. take you away..

"oh hey ----!"

i'm right here..

"sorry -----'s sitting with me"

we did this together though...

"----- and ---- want to sit with me"

what about me..?

"we're low key married because of ---- and -----. like hamilton, y'know?"

c'mon... we started that joke together 2 years ago.. before you met her..

"so me and ---- were texting last night til 3am! it was so funny!"

you.. you never... text me...

"so 'papa france' -~~~~~~~_"

you.. don't call.. me... my .. nickname you gave me.. anymore..

"so babe~!"

she's the only one who can call me that...------

"hey 3v4"

what happened to my nicknames you used to call me...?
sorry i took out the names, the random symbols are convo, and 3v4 is just eva
 May 2019
juno
i feel like i'm going to rip out all my hair
i feel like i'm going to cave in my skull
i feel like i'm going to have a 3 hour panic attack
i feel like i'm going to punch my chest til my heart gets punctured.
i feel like i'm going to **** someone
i feel like i'm going to accidentally hurt you.


i feel like i'm going to die.

— The End —