My Second family
Thats how I think of you
You'll be forever dear to my heart
Even when the world seems blue

Its been a rough few years
With a lot of torment and lies
But we managed through it
All the lows and the highs

We don't see each other as often
As we once did in the past
though when we do
We try to make the moment last

Barely any words are spoken
On our brief interactions
Though we hug every time
To make up for the time missed
Even if its just a fraction

Tightly we hold on
Letting go but a moment to soon
But our lives counteract one another
We only see each other once in a blue moon

Though we have time to make
Our future is far ahead
We can rekindle our sparks
And try to help it mend

I still love you with all my heart
My dear old friend
And I miss you dearly
I hope we can make our amends

Because I miss when we would laugh
Over dumb stories and things
Talk about our crazy family tree
You would tell me of your flings

We would hang off each other
During casual conversations
We were once so close
Thinking of it now fills me with frustration

Though its neither of our faults
Or maybe both at the same time
that we left ourselves drift apart
Over this long period of time

But you have other people
You have higher priorities in your life
I can't keep asking to be
The same key person that you need

Because sometimes life gets in the way
whether we want it to or not
All we can do is try and work with it
While trying not to be caught

You keep strumming your guitar
and chasing after your dream girl
I'll still be around though
When the whole world beings to whirl

The trio of us three
Will forever remain in peace
The family of all of us
Has begun to cease

Though fight against it we might
With all the strength that we have
We are the only ones who can change this
Slowly this time we can try again
Otherwise we can just remiss

So to my dear friend
Let's do our best from here on out
I refuse to let our friendship die
Filled with endless doubt

Of the what if we tried a little more?
Or could we have changed the fates?
Was this the only way?
Could we have stayed mates?

Though whatever happens I'll love you
From your striking blue eyes
To your overly sensitive knees
One of my first french owl allies

It'll be there for your sock dropping self
A soft spot laid within my heart
And hopefully no matter the end
It won't end up tearing me apart

I miss you.

~

~

Nobody Loves me
Nobody really cares

But I do my darling
Just take a look into my eyes
I've been through hell and back with you
Together we have touched the skies

From the beginning to the end
We've seen each other through it
The lies and deceit, heart stopping truths
Where others would have split
We made it through our youth

When we first met you were smol
Barely even my height
A friendship made through stripper jokes
And you being my favourite white

Casual racism erupted
A classic joke among our friends
During a time where we were once happy
Innocent even, before that bitter end

Slowly you grew taller
Quite frankly you have changed
No longer that touchy goofball
Reasoning for that we leave unexplained

Though I still love you dearly
No matter what kind of person you become
Even if you turned into a vile beast
I would still act like your mum

From your oddly perfectly shaped eyebrows
Those glistening endless voids you call your eyes
Hair roughly pushed to the side
Matched with a cheeky grin that people seem to idolise

3 Years I would say its been
Though clearly its the wrong number
Knowing all about your weird life
Sharing memories from past summers

An ungodly collection of hats
littered throughout your room
The ugly ones shoved above the closet
That black one with green splats I presume

We went to that amazing concert together
Rocking it out within the mosh pit
I'll never forget that amazing day
As we reconnected even if it was just a bit

Your escape through street fighting
A dark time for both of us I remember
But it looks like we stuck it out
We made it past that December

Even if we wanted to end it all
The depression still hitting us in waves
The relaps of that fateful period
Still echoes within my brain

But like I've said once
And will say a million times over
I love you my dear boy
Even if you feel like a complete loner

I'll continue holding my hand out
Incase you slip and fall
Even if you don't need it
Just don't forget its there is all


I want you to know
I love you
Remember that Riy


~

I watched it all happened
I watched it all burn down
And yet I stood there watching
Without uttering a single sound

I knew all their secrests
I knew all their lies
I knew the real stories
All from each side

Trusted by all
They told me all things
But I stood there in silence
As they played a game of kings

Doing nothing at all
Even though i held the power
I just let them fall
Withering like a flower

Times have moved on
They are all no longer friends
I'm the last connection
There is no chance they will make amends

People fall apart
All rundown to different ends
Hatred and recentment burns
Though cast away by the winds

I see them all now
And even I've lost that spark
The one I once held
When the whole world seemed dark

As I stand upon the ashes
Of the loving people I once knew
That time gone and forgotten now
The very thought to which is taboo

Yet here I stand
At what was the foundation of the past
Holding the matchbox in hand
Crying, I thought it would last

I did nothing to stop it
I myself set it ablaze
So much for the peacekeeper
all she could do was gaze

And try and act innocent
Attempting not to get burnt
You would think after such tragedy
That I would have learnt

But its a burden I'll carry
Right down to my grave
Knowing I destroyed them
When they could have been saved

I let them burn
What kind of a monster does that?
*******...

I'm Guilty


~

To be honest
I'm happy
I'm content with my life
I wouldn't change a thing
From the past to the present
All the people I loved
I'll never regret
And all the things that I've done
Even the things that leave holes in my chest
To all the mistakes I've made
And to all the people I've hurt
Each thing made me who I am
All the love and the pain
I wish for nothing more
Except for everything to stay in its place
But even when things stay
They still ever so slightly change
Changing in colour, in feeling and shape
To wish for the inevitable
That is part of my fate
There is no stopping time
I know this one well
But it still won't stop me hoping
Upon it I'll eternally dwell
To all the people in my life
And all those gone
I loved each moment spent with you
From the dusk to the dawn

He was my first
Love
My first
Heartbreak

He was the first
Boy who made me smile
Yet
Cry a thousand tears

He was the first boy
To keep me awake all night
That left me
Feeling hopeless but full of light

He was the first
Sunset at the dawn
Glowing with colours so bright
But he was also quite capable
Of being the terrors of the night

He was warm
Chocolate brown eyes
His smile set blaze to my heart
But all while tearing it apart

He was cold
Stringing me along for fun
Yet even so I loved him
I never wanted to run

He was a mixture
Of bitter and sweet
Just one taste
Had my knees falling weak

He was my oxygen
The air that I breath
Without him
I was consumed by grief

Though now
As I walk these halls
I know to him
I mean nothing at all

He was the first boy
Who left meaning in my heart
I'll always have a soft spot for him
Eternalized within memory as the boy who was once my sweeheart

Every time the rain comes down
Gently pattering on the rooftops
Cold and yet so peaceful
When everything just seems to stop

I'll be there on your doorstep
Ready to take your hand
To warm your broken heart
Allowing you to withstand

Every time the rain comes down
I'll be there by your side
Fluffy blankets and hot coco
I promise you will be safe and dry

I'll be the knight that guards your door
So you may sleep pleasantly at ease
I'll chase away the demons
At last you may have some peace

Every time the rain comes down
I promise I will be around
Don't worry for I'll protect you
This storm will simply pass through

It'll be okay
As it cant rain forever
Dark gloomy clouds will pass us by
After the rain things always get better