𝙱𝚁𝙰𝙸𝙽: 𝙲𝚞𝚝!! 𝙲𝚞𝚞𝚞𝚝!!! 𝙲𝚞𝚞𝚞𝚞𝚞𝚞𝚝𝚝!!!
              𝚃𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚎 𝚊𝚒𝚗'𝚝 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚌𝚛𝚒𝚙𝚝.

I let different boys touch me
Because I wanted to know
Even for a second
What it felt like to be loved
Even if the love was cheap
And it tasted like ***
Like the punchline to a joke
I never got because it was me

I let different boys have different parts of me
Parts they didn't deserve
But I offered up willingly because I couldn't give anything else
after you broke me
I was looking for different fingers
to place different pieces and hoping  the outcome
would be a masterpiece
Maybe one of them would find a way
to cover up the handprints you left all over me

I let different boys touch me because I had to prove to myself
you wouldn't be the only one
that these scars marking my body wouldn't define
my worth to be loved
I am not entirely sure  
you aren't the only one who could ever touch me without slightly  flinching

I let different boys touch me because that is all I have been taught
To be a joke
To be silent
To be ready to give until you have nothing left
- they keep leaving me and I am to scared to offer up anything more than my body to get them to stay

I love him
I tell myself
I know that
We will be together forever
I don’t believe that
We could be separated
My thoughts tell me that
He’s the love of my life
Sometimes my heart lies and says
I could live an eternity
Without him
Like my friends say
“We’re perfect for each other”
And you can’t tell me
He’s not the one.

Now read from bottom to top.

𝚈𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎, 𝚊 𝚝𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚙𝚎.
     𝚈𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚝, 𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝚌𝚘𝚕𝚍.
          𝚂𝚘 𝚏𝚊𝚛, 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚌𝚕𝚘𝚜𝚎.

                               𝙼𝚢 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎, 𝚏𝚊𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐.
                               𝙼𝚢 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚝, 𝚠𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚢.
                               𝚆𝚎 𝚘𝚗𝚌𝚎, 𝚕𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚍 𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚢!

                𝙸𝚝 𝚛𝚊𝚒𝚗𝚜, 𝚒𝚝 𝚙𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜.
                𝙻𝚒𝚏𝚎, 𝚊 𝚋𝚘𝚡 𝚘𝚏 𝚌𝚑𝚘𝚌𝚘𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚜.
                𝚄𝚜? 𝚈𝚘𝚞'𝚛𝚎 𝚊𝚗 𝚎𝚡.

𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚎𝚢𝚎𝚜,
𝙱𝚞𝚝 𝙸’𝚖 𝚊𝚏𝚛𝚊𝚒𝚍 𝚘𝚏 𝚐𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚕𝚘𝚜𝚝.
𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝,
𝙱𝚞𝚝 𝙸’𝚕𝚕 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚎𝚗𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑.

   𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝙸 𝚍𝚘𝚗’𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠..
   𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚖𝚞𝚌𝚑 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚏𝚊𝚕𝚕,
   𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝙸 𝚔𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚏𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚎𝚊𝚌𝚑 𝚍𝚊𝚢,
   𝚒𝚗 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚢𝚘𝚞.

         𝚂𝚘 𝚕𝚎𝚝 𝚖𝚎 𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝,
         𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚕𝚎𝚝 𝚐𝚘
         𝙻𝚘𝚘𝚔 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚋𝚎𝚊𝚞𝚝𝚒𝚏𝚞𝚕 𝚎𝚢𝚎𝚜
         𝚄𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚕 𝙸’𝚖 𝚕𝚘𝚜𝚝.

𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚋𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚢 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎

____________
𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗'𝚝 𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚎      
𝙱𝚞𝚝 𝚒𝚝'𝚜 𝚑𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚠𝚎 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚝𝚊𝚕𝚔
𝙵𝚎𝚎𝚕𝚜 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝙸'𝚖 𝚗𝚘 𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎
𝙻𝚘𝚜𝚝
.

𝙸𝚝'𝚜 𝚍𝚊𝚛𝚔 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚜𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚢
𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗'𝚝 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕 𝚖𝚢 𝚜𝚘𝚞𝚕
𝙸𝚝'𝚜 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎'𝚜 𝚗𝚘 𝚌𝚞𝚛𝚎
𝙽𝚞𝚖𝚋
.

𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝙸 𝚜𝚎𝚎 𝚞𝚛 𝚝𝚡𝚝
𝙸𝚝'𝚜 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢 𝚏𝚒𝚛𝚜𝚝 𝚍𝚊𝚢 𝚠𝚎 𝚖𝚎𝚝
𝚄 𝚊𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚕𝚎𝚏𝚝 𝚖𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎
𝙷𝚘𝚙𝚎
.

𝚆𝚒𝚜𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚊 𝚋𝚞𝚝𝚝𝚘𝚗 𝙸 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚜
𝚃𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚊𝚠𝚊𝚢 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚖𝚎𝚜𝚜
𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝 𝚊𝚏𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚑
😪

𝙱𝚞𝚝 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍𝚗’𝚝 𝚜𝚘 𝚕𝚒𝚎𝚍, 𝙸 𝚘𝚗𝚕𝚢 𝚜𝚊𝚒𝚍 𝚐𝚘𝚘𝚍𝚋𝚢𝚎.
𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚝𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚎, 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚍𝚊𝚢 𝚠𝚎 𝚖𝚎𝚝
𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚜𝚎𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝, 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚍𝚊𝚢 𝚠𝚎 𝚖𝚎𝚝.

𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚍, 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚋𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚐𝚞𝚢
𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚔𝚒𝚜𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚕𝚒𝚙𝚜, 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝
𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚜𝚎𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚎𝚢𝚎𝚜, 𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚋𝚎𝚊𝚞𝚝𝚒𝚏𝚞𝚕 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚊𝚛𝚎
𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢, “𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚋𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚐𝚒𝚛𝚕”
𝚂𝚘 𝚝𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚍, 𝚕𝚎𝚝’𝚜 𝚏𝚕𝚢 𝚊𝚠𝚊𝚢 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚎 𝚠𝚎 𝚖𝚎𝚝.