It's hard to keep going everyday without you...
I miss you, y'know? I miss you...

I miss your smiling eyes that belied your emotionless face
I miss all our long conversations into the deep night
Whether they were absolutely meaningless or serious
Just to lay with you long after I should have been asleep...
Yeah, I miss you...

I miss kissing your forehead everytime we had to say goodbye
I miss the anticipation of seeing you after we'd been away
I miss all of your poetry you carved into my spirit
Barfight
On How to Love a God
If You Talk Enough Sense You'll Lose Your Mind
Nadya and Fatima (Such a great one)
Sun Kissed
Woman Lay With  Wolves...

I bet you didn't think I'd know your poems like that...
But you overcame my stubborn heart & I carved you into me
Molded and sewed every stitch of you to me
& I miss how you stole my heart away...
& I miss how I fell in love with your mind long before I fell in love with your body. (What a body it is, too)

I don't know if you'll ever see this letter to you
Part of me doesn't want you to because you'll know
Just how many tears I've shed missing you
& how bitter I am that you were ripped away from me

I miss you, y'know? I miss you...
& even though you're gone away
You left your sparkle in my eyes...

When I see you
Every day feels like Christmas
Because if giving is truly better than receiving
Than I'd give you the entire world
And set it in the palm of your hand
But as I am just me
And I am unable to give you the world
Please let me be
Some of the happiest memories you ever create

Your kiss on my lips
Doesn't fit anymore
The spaces between our fingers
Doesn't complement at all

You caused my heart
To break into pieces
And now that you are trying to stitch it
The pieces don't fit anymore

The pieces won't fit anymore
Or maybe won't be completed at all
(Because parts of me, I already gave to you)

I may be whole again (maybe not)
But never the same
There will be holes and cracks
But I guess, I can still be functional
I hope..

You keep on hiding the pain
When all I wanted to do is break the chain
You keep on covering the tears
When all I wanted to do is embrace your fears
You keep on saying goodbye
When I know it’s just a lie
Why do you keep on pushing me away
When all I wanted to do is stay?

I sit amongst
people I know
people who have
the same blood
and the same
historic milestones

and yet we are so different

i feel the black sheep coat
knitting itself about me once more
high turtle neck choking me
and wool coarse, causing my soul
to itch and raise hives...

as i sit  with family
but excluded by feelings
both mine and their
I must be true
and cry mea culpa... too

when  I was younger
I ran to the end of my tether
and was held to the family tree
by mere threads  
of silken spider web loyalty

then as I aged  
I reeled myself
back to the shore
of shared mythology

only to find my time
of freedom at the
end of the line
gave me a permanent
feeling of never having
been there...

and now as they visit
the mother of us all
we sit in polite conversation
about the progeny of us
and I think that
our particular dysfunction
is more of an exclusion
of the intricate nature
of bonding and care...

we are tied loosely
this bundle of family sticks
and I fear once
the bind that ties
the love of our mother
most dear
is torn from us
even now
she is threadbare
and once that is broken

our nature of exclusion
will scatter us to the wind
.....a family tree laid bare

It's funny I seem to think,
How small your mind is,
I think it still shrinks.

It's tiny.....little and small.
I think we all get it,
It's anything but tall.

You have no perception,
You're riddled with fear.

You question all the others,
Just why are you here?

Is there something your missing?
A lie you've yet told?

Are you ashamed too?
Of the secrets you hold?

You see,I stand in the sun.
With my arms open wide

I'm proud of who I am,
Yet you cower inside.

Away in the shadows,
Screaming out lies.

No I am not a coward,
I love who I desire,

Maybe one day you'll learn how
To extinguish your fire.

Love is like an autumn leaf  which is pale yellow
Blood of a lover makes it to be beautifully green
To make in its stream blood to give life to flow
I am your king and my love you are my queen

Let me be a friend, a lover and a savior of my life
Let us be part of moon galaxies and all the stars
All my rivals want to butcher me with hatred knife
Chain my love in your tresses and behind bars

Love is a continuous fountain of love to spring
Beauty is a constant source of happiness,pleasure
Let us chain love and beauty in an eternal string
Love is just the most beautiful universal treasure

Col Muhammad Khalid Khan
Copyright 2017 Golden Glow

I'm sleeping, or maybe it's a dream.
That everything is fine and you are exactly what you seem.
It would be different,  in another world i think.
If i were to able fly, but you force me to sink.
I'm drowning, I've forgotten to swim.
The lies you tell, like anchors, pull me down from within.
With my last breath, i need to say.
Everything I've never said, all my thoughts I've locked away.

So you think that you are perfect? Because thats what no one sees.
Take a look at the water, your reflection, you'll see what i mean.
Your lost, trying to stay afloat. I wish i were the wave that sinks your imaginary boat.

So while i'm drowning, asleep in the dark.
Please stop lying to yourself and pretending to have a heart.