9:40 to 6:40. What's in 3 hours?
I've asked myself this time
And time again. 3 hours is everything.
I've seen blushing brides kiss their ivory goodbye
Knees trembling, sweat pooled under beaded satin
3 hours is enough time to take a pill, or 20.
Little pink and white advertisements, like a carnival
"Eat me," they whisper. And you do, until it hurts.
3 hours is the concert that changed your life.
It's a plane flight. Clouds race away from under you,
leaving you with naught but a dead drop.
The ghosts they leave leer, until wind chases them away.
3 hours is the lover you never expected to find you
And the heartbreak that catalyzed a barbed-wire ribcage.
You wonder why I worry about the time difference.
3 hours is everything. It's still light where you are,
But I'm in the dark. Cavernous, empty and stale.
What can light promise that darkness can't?
3 hours could be the coronation of a king,
Or the end of an era.
So you see, if that light hooks you, fills you
You'll be brim-full, teeming, ablaze
And there will be nothing, nothing in the dark
No space for me--anyone--anything
Savor those 3 hours, breathe them in
But don't forget the dark that touched you first.

And it's nights like tonight
while i sit in the dark
alone at last
and the weight of life
of sin
and death
and pain
of losing one's mind
all press down upon
my shoulders
at once.
And there the vultures
wait for me to bleed.

Friday 28**
the lack of attention,
lack of sexuality weighed on my shoulders
the abundance of stress and hardships
without any distraction
all at once
***** take away the pain
and it does
surrounded by beautiful people
with strangely demented faces
at least from my point of view
they watch over me as i stumble
a small rest in an elevator with pranksters
a cigarette on the balcony with..
who knows
a burning cigarette resting on my body somewhere
gum in my hair
then in the taco bell drive through
removing the toxins, in the worst of ways
and heading to the drunken second home of the beauties  

he cuddles me to sleep

I** fall in love with passion.

The way someone's face lights up when they talk.
The way they can't get enough of something they really, really like.
The way they thirst for adventure and experience.
The way they never stop dreaming and believing because they have that much faith that it will, one day, be worth it.
The way they always build people up and make others feel like they're floating on clouds.
The way they do things they may not love, for the people they love.

And that's why I've fallen in love with you.