Sadness is not just tears
And sobs
And mourning and
Isolation

Sadness is the bags under your eyes
Because you can't sleep at night
Sadness is the indifferent silence where laughter used to ring

Sadness is empty chore where
Passion used to flow
Sadness is an occupied bed
With no sleeping scheduled

Sadness is the empty glint in your eyes
Where a twinkle used to shine
Sadness is a heavy sigh at
Two in the morning

And two in the afternoon
Sadness is losing interest
In people you used to adore
Sadness is slipping

From life everyday
But still breathing
Sadness is
Not sadness

This Sadness is Depression.
And Depression is dying
While you're still alive

Heavy eyes
Reluctant compromise
Ordinary routine lies
That tear and vaporize

I want to know the why's

I can feel
Every popping seam
And every tearing stitch
in the fabric of
our intersewn lives

I can feel the dividing powers
Not quite separating evenly
But taking and leaving
pieces of each other

As we go our own ways
Perhaps not in the physical world
Maybe not mentally either
but the implications are as clear as our once pronounced coexistence

Soon we will part
Turn and walk away from
a piece of our dying heart(s)
not feeling much but numb

And the apathy will even out
our gains and loses
so that we dont feel anything
as we break what once was

And despite the strange estrange
Given the warm memories
That leave me now frost with tears
or sadness that it should insinuate

That is not what squeezes me
Thats not what troubles me
It isnt whats left me puzzled
But what is

Is the fact that I am not as
grief-stricken
or heavy-hearted
anguished
as I'd presumed to be

And oh how much
How much that worries me

If you wish
You can wait.

Patience I ask
And understanding I plead
I know how enormous the task
So I won't blame you if you leave

I'm sorry I'm confusing
I'm sorry that I love(d?) You
I'm sorry for choosing
Your ears to bear me too

I know that you care
But subelty is not enough
I need someone to declare
Not hearing those words is tough

Im invasive
I need to know the how and why
I may seem abrasive
And I apologize for when I persistently try

But that is who I am
And if you cannot see through
If you cant seem to accept it, well ****
I'll sure miss you

Painting in different directions
Striving towards a painted goal
The chaos works as a nasty infection
In the pure health of the knitted souls

And all because half cannot
Make up her mind
Its seems all her training she's forgot
And her logic nowhere to find

And with each hesitant word
Comes a falling painted chip
To think of its demise would be absurd
How so much damage come from one lip?

Nothing but sky and earth clashing
Winds of desperation thrashing
Calming waters come out lashing
And everything I've ever known seems to be
Vanishing