She was like coffee.
So hot,
So brown.

She was like coffee.
So sweet,
So fresh.

Her coffee was the best,
Her coffee was the best.

She smelled of many things.
Her body like almonds and honey,
Her hair like strawberries and kiwi.
I inhaled it all as i stared at her.
Her shirt kept up by spaghetti straps.
It showed skin although it was nothing to revealing.
All that was exposed was her arms,
Her shoulder,
Her collarbone,
Her neck,
But that was all I needed.
That's all it took to cause the gears to turn and my body to burn.
That's all it took to make me long for the feel of her warm surface.
I wanted her.
So bad and so much,
That I wanted to run my hands up from her fingertips to her shoulders,
Just so they could move down her body.
She had me,
Locked and lost in deep thoughts of lust.
Under her spell I was caught.
Under her spell I was held prisoner to my own carnal desires.
See I dreamt once,
Of hugging her from behind.
My arms around her waist,
Whispering only the sweetest nothing's in her ear,
And now that dream is here.
We finally stand with our bodies demanding to be touched.
Finally extending our connection.
We stimulate each others sense of touch in every way.
We play,
Pulling each other closer to a ****** with each giggling moan.
Her body I own and it is shown,
Through each time my hands lay on her her body shudders.
Her words slurr through partial stutters,
And her back defies gravity as it bends upwards,
But she owns me too.
I will forever cling to her taste,
So sweet and pure I hope there's more in-store.
My taste buds tingle at the thought of her.

She was like coffee.
I became addicted to her caffeine.

She was like coffee.
Simply delicious and delightful.

Her coffee was the best,
Her coffee was the best.

The clothes I wear,
The appearance I keep,
It is not me!
And at times, as if I'm a cross-dresser I wear clothes made not for I.
Cloths of contentment,
Material of merriment,
Fabrics of fulfilling delight.
All sewed together by a needle of negativity.
By thread of tranquilizing pain and depression.
I cross from sad to happy only in appearance.
Only after dressing into clothes not meant for me can the smile on my masked face be renewed.
When will the cross-dresser I am cease to be me?

As we kiss,
Our hips like waves of flesh crash together.
Into one another they collide like two craters pulled in by gravity.
Our bodies connect like two streets at an intersection,
Lines "X" and "Y".
Your body as if a black hole ***** me in.
I ****** moving deeper with every movement.
You moan,
Such an ear tingling sound.
It slips through clenched teeth, only after climbing up your throat.
A song like no other,
Made only when your body is pushed to its point of bliss.
As we kiss,
Your heart races as if running for Olympic gold.
Your mind becomes clouded by a satisfying fog.
The sensitivity of our bodies skyrocket.
Our body's are overheated by our sensual passion.
Our hands intertwining fully making us one entity.
As we kiss,
Ecstasy in it's most unsullied state is reached.

As i close my eyes i think of only you.
A girl who makes my heart beat fast cause she's so beautiful.
Her smile rivaling the firey beams of the sun.
Just the sight of her makes my heart dizzy as if spun.

The thought of her throws my stomach's butterflies into a frenzy.
i never thought such a beautiful being could be so friendly.
Her compassionate brown eyes sparkle with an infinite love.
Her infinite love ebraces all like a cozzy warm hug.

You are a person who should be held and showed the world.
The truth is whether you know it or not, your a one in a billion girl.
Your smart and destined for great things, just knowing you I'm glad.
You deserve the best, not tears and the feeling of being sad.

As i think of your mistakes, my heart and mind they conversate.
Although i think at times we're bad, my heart it walks the line of fate.
I think we should sometimes take a break, but my heart can't stand to separate.
So I'm stuck without a decision made, in my contradictions i levitate.

Floating their as my heart beats for you.
But my brain not in agreement, turns my heart beats blue.
You and i put so much time into this.
I don't want to cross you off like you a wish on my list.

One that i had or couldn't get, but I'm ultimately over.
Your supposed to be the one i cuddle with when we old and older.
My heart doesn't want to give up, but what if my mind is right?
If i told your actions is making me walk away, Baby would you change for me and fight?

I'm close,
I can feel the barrel of the gun.
It's cold hard frame pressed against my twists.
My finger inching the trigger back, as i take a deep breath.
A single bullet,
A one way trip to an eternal dream.
See cause i smile you looked at my cover never reading a page.
My book is not as it seems it will make a smile fade.
I never wanted this exit but i'm at my last stage.
Me a Death has come to an agreement that are wants are mutual.
So as this bullet rockets into my skull as if a pass hurled down a field my brain receives it.
My heart stops like the crowd of the opposing team.
Like a referee, Death signals the game of live over.

I'm not spewing no hate, I'm just being honest.
This not a Disney Channel movie, no Pocahontas.
Not really a fan of Father's Day, cause i ain't have a father.
I felt as a kid, he was just like why bother.

As i got older i wished that he had tried harder.
Consistent phone calls, that would have been a good starter.
But i ain't get any of it, and soon i was like **** it.
I got tired of waiting for something and receiving nothing.

At a point in time i started to hate him.
My heart for him was cold, like who the hell wants to chase him.
That feeling went on for a couple years.
My heart and mental kept changing like i was switching gears.

Since we being honest recently those feelings stopped.
You can't hate a stranger and truth is i don't know my pops.
Although you said you love me and i said i love you back.
Love and hate has twin rules, so what type of love is that.

I mean it's not sincere.
It's like you're pushed to say it like you're pressured by your peers.
And I'm not saying that it's sad and that brings me tears.
But man-to-man it ain't something that i want to hear.

They not understanding, I see glimpses of death.
I keep telling y'all I'm not right, but i guess y'all are deaf.
My last straw been plucked, holding to sanity by a stitch.
Im on my last leg, but i feel I'm 'bout to slip.

Body bags and blood splatters, those pictures flash in when i blink.
I'm laughing at the pain i feel until i can't think.
From the outside I'm ok, on the instide I'm wrecked.
I'm like building with bad foundation, i need to be checked.

I feel that point is coming, when the me y'all know disappears.
When my heart and soul welcomes the darkness, the hate, my fears.
When nothing will reach me, when I'll forget the word calm.
When my last tick, ticks and i explode like a bomb.

Head gently tucked under my chin.
A few hair strands still wild, untamed by the teeth of a comb.
The fruity scent of shampoo creeps into my nostrils.
It slowly climbs, releasing it's permeating fumes.
She kisses my jaw line.
Her lips like hot meteors of flesh.
Though big, they're soft as the cotton picked by my ancestors.
I rest my hands on hip and thigh.
A thick mountain of love.
A tower of seductive flesh.
Her hand on top of mine.
Smooth and delicate.
Assuring and comforting.
Our fingers twist around one another locking.
I'm hers, she's mine.
Our moment.
What a beautiful Saturday.

Two boys, two shots, one boy, one body, no time to cool it.
One car, two cops, two guns, one bullet.
Trigger squeezed back, brains pushed out.
Everyone only asked why'd he have to take that route.

Rewind back four months, one black eye, one arm break.
Rewind back two weeks, seven bruises, one scrape.
Fast forward day-of, ****** nose, swollen lip.
He finally snapped, went home, no class, just skipped.

As he got home, he headed straight for his dads glock.
He knew the nine millimeter was in a closet in a box.
When he gripped it, thoughts hit him and his mind started slipping.
The thought of simply scaring someone completely went missing.

2:30 pm, outside the school he was waiting.
Impatient and nervous, in his head he was debating.
With his choice made, he walked to the school to put the gun in the trash.
But as he turned he got hit with the force of a crash.

One chuckle, many tears, one turn, one sound.
As the bullied stood up the bully went down.
Drowning out the sound of screams, sirens drew near.
His mind cleared up, and he panicked from the fear.

Two doors opened, two closed, 3 guns held, 2 hands shake.
At the moment his mind closed, he saw only one choice to take.
Two cops, one voice, "Stay calm and put the gun down."
But he panicked, raised it, then whispered "My life's all over now."

BANG!