i hated my father
a lot
i used to wish i was born fatherless
now i wish he lives longer
he is weak
fragile
but strong
he never cry
or leave me
but i did
now i regret everything

crying is my way to tell God
that i still need him

i lost you
i lost my world

i have fear of not having you.

if you read this, i want you to know that i love you so much. i dont care if you are with another girl, or you already build a family or youre there thinking of me. thinking how stupid i am. thinking how much time youve spent not to think of me. you are busy, i know. you are in love, i really know it. you are not in love with me, i know. i cried, the night i wrote this. the night i saw you with your dream girl. the night i had to pretend that i was being in good mood. i had to pretend i didnt know you. to pretend that you werent there. to pretend that i never knew you. i was tired that night. tired to hold the tears, so i decided to go home early. and funny thing was, i didnt cry. crying is for *******, so i decide to 'cut' my feeling. it hurt, a lot. but i didnt care. i lied. i cried. i care about you till now.

dear you, the luckiest girl ever, please hug him for me. take care of him. love him.
iloveyou mr red

every time you tell a lie,
it turns out to be a spell
to hypnotize me
and make me believe
that i'm fine.

truth is, i'm not fine at all.

Ignore me
as long as the sun shines
So one day,
when I die
I'll blame my death on you
Feel guilty
as long as you hate me

Have no blood left,
and I'm still bleeding.

If I die tomorrow,
will you attend my funeral?