words that define
as splendors so grasp
tight to my soul
and i just laugh

the smiles tug at heartstrings
like warmth, closer, the hearth brings
oh shallow say i, release that hold
lest consume thine mind like paper folds

become abound, the joyous whispers
contained in echoes all for you
they reach out, over, through and through

falter not or sure to bet
that life will lead you to regret
and handsome though you'll ever be
remain you callous, and you will see

"This is nice?"
You stated nervously, as if it where a question you shouldn't be asking.

I nodded.
- Cringing at your lack of confidence

"Yeah it is, Thankyou."
- for teaching me how to be fake.

"I'm glad your having a nice time"
You said, fiddling with the zip on your jacket pocket.

I could not reply, I just smiled numbly.

You smiled too.
- numbly.

This was when I realised I was talking to myself.

Taking to someone who's thoughts, where so similar to my own.

Talking to someone who was always asking.

I had caught a glimpse of what it was like to be around me, and hated it.

- I hated me.

I hated my unsteady heart beat, my constant need for reassurance.

I hated that I craved acceptance and would do anything to receive it.

I hated that I was so scared of disappointing him, like you where scared of disappointing me.

- I hated the fact I was fragile

Your fingers slowly brushed against my palm, I guess you where asking if we could hold hands, but I moved away.

You where so shy and so sweet and so good, I knew that, but I also knew me.

*- I couldn't hold into something that I knew was going to break.

A picture is worth a thousand words but a word can paint a thousand pictures,
Depending on where you stand with your current emotional mixture,
Is it really so hard to Imagine everything isn't what we see?,
But only a picture in our minds of what we really want it to be?,
Intentions are energy made manifest by the way we carry on our day,
Reality is simply a karmic dance and we choose what music to play,
There's this indescribable beauty hidden in and all around,
What vibrates in our minds and hearts came from the sky and ground,
How small we are with endless space lurking in waiting within,
We really are deep vast oceans with our bodies as layers of ice so thin,
I wish so bad you could come with me I want to take you to the quiet,
But we can only meet there in harmony once you have decided to try it,
Thoughts are like food we can pick and choose which ones to digest,
The complexity of simplicity is clarity when we finally put our minds to rest.

People often use the term "home is where the heart is" as reference that home is a literal place. That you can touch it, feel it, live in it and it's physically there. But I just can't seem to wrap my mind around that. Because my heart belongs to a home that isn't there in a physical sense. My home is the way you say my name and draw circles on my lower back. My home is built and structured in between your arms and in the crook of your neck. I've never felt more at home then when we are skin to skin and I want to pull you even closer. No my home is not a building, my home is you and that's where my heart will always be.

My dad dug his foot into my back like a shovel breaking soil.
If I do enough push ups, can I put a smile on your face.
If I move the earth for you, will meteors stop me.

I carried sparklers in my hands while cannon-kisses erupted in the sky,
and my cousin swore that I'd hurt myself.
But I explained to him that history repeats itself,
and that my hurt is unavoidable.

Like the hug of a grieving grandmother,
and the staring off into space,
as her tears stain my white oxford lie.
There's no way to get out of this place.
Finding new ways to live in death.

I don't want to be cool. I don't want to be cool.

And her fingers left a ******* on my back.
And my mouth melted onto hers.
I love her until my eyes **** in sleep.
And it's deep. And it's deep.

The swirl of the ceiling sank down
like a child being drowned by his mother.
And I missed my brother, and I missed it all.

I don't want to be cool. I don't want to be cool.
No, not anymore.

"It's so pretty out today," she said
with a beaming smile on her face
a look of lust in her eyes
staring out the window at the sky
cloud streaked and grey
dark & gloomy at it's finest
she was always most romantic about the darkest things.


*smndi

I'm battling my own demons while at the same time fighting off hers
like a prince slaying dragons for the princess
she never asked you to, but you do it anyways
don't get me wrong
she's no damsel in distress
she's her own knight in toughest armor
but you're still there
to pull the sword from the stone
when she just can't find the strength
to kiss her awake
when she can't get herself out of bed
to free her from whatever tower
she's locked up inside of
because my life may not be a fairytale
but I'll be ****** if I don't make hers feel like one.


ᴍjᴍ