anita

anita Jul 14

beautiful boy with the golden eyes
please don’t make me cry
the weight of your words changed my life
these feelings I have
I’ve never felt til tonight
in this moment it’s like suicide
taking my life
the decision’s all mine
I suppose it’s a toxic love
that’s really all I know
but I’m in it til the end
I won't let go

can't seem to quit you.

#love #loss #depressed #toxic #relationships #unrequited

anita Nov 2023

the boy from arkansas

i stand there
watching you walk by
i can’t speak
you’ve got me tongue tied
what will it take
to erase you
you haunt my
withering mind

you came back. they said you would

#heartbreak #love #sad #nostalgia #relationships #closure

anita Apr 2023

d.w.t

you
are my weapon of choice
and i have
a death wish
who knew you could **** me
so easily?
every word you speak
feels like a razor to my skin
why don’t i stop
the bleeding?

self punishment/when you realize you’re not as important to someone as you thought you were

#heartbroken #sad #depression #love #lust #life

anita Feb 2023

alone in my thoughts

sometimes my hardest nights are my best ones.
the nights where i am lonely, but not alone
the nights where i stare up at the sky
and see all those stars
and i realize that the world is so infinite
the nights that remind me that we are all just trying our best
and we all feel like strangers in our own bodies sometimes
and that despite how much we try to convince ourselves otherwise,
things
will
be
okay

i can't get out of my head

#alone #infinite #thoughts #bittersweet #recovery #depression #cptsd #anxiety #survivor

anita May 2022

i am rising

my eyes are a bit brighter
the weight of my mind is lighter
i finally feel alive.
i am holding on for my life
it had been such a ****** up time
but for once
i am rising.

i have been clean for 2 years <3 i finally have some hope again

#happy #recovery #depression #anxiety #affirmations #life #love

anita Jul 2020

not a poem, a rant.

i am tired.
tired of life, i guess.
every day seems to drag on, page by page.
i am slowly withering away.
i don't even pretend anymore, because pretending is exhausting
and i don't have the energy.
i think i want to die but really, i just want to live again.
i am worried about myself.
i am worried about where i am going.
i just need help.
i just need someone..

i am tired.
and i wish it would just go away.

#bipolar #depression #help #sad #rant

anita May 2020

slip away

i will wait here
patiently
tell me we're wrong
but i will still hold on
i would wait
forever
just to feel your touch
don't slip away from me yet
my love

i finally found you and i don't want to let go

#love #chase #forever #forbidden