I found that, in the midst of my panic,
I only saw one person who would be capable of reassuring me
only one person with whom I would trust
my knowledge and passing into the great beyond
only he would make sense of it and guide me into that journey
for I knew and I assumed
that he and only he
knew where I was going.
the amount of trust I have for Mr. R is unbelievable. This bizarre notion struck up out of nowhere- that I well and truly believed that everyone else was just lost in the cosmos and he had somehow found the secret and since I was about to die I needed to ask him what it was so that I could die peacefully.