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A friend of mine told me
I write when I’m sad
She said it is as if I am in pain
And I said when I write it rains
When I put the pen on paper the clouds get dark
And when I stop
The birds of the sky sings
Coming out to play as the sun is out
I keep thinking about all the things we could become,
about adventures we would put in our pockets,
and watch the dark capture the sun.

But I’m sure you don’t know how I feel,
but it’s not you who is spellbound,
since it’s you who spins the wheel.

I know you, yet you are still a stranger,
it’s rather funny the way we met,
but now I sense the inevitable danger.

Sometimes we don’t talk for a while
yet I still wonder how you’re doing,
and then I can’t stop to smile.

To be honest I would like to run away,
but you keep me tied to your wrist,
without hearing the words I have to say.

I think we have a lot of calamity in us,
yet it seems to hurt me the most,
so hit me with your best shot.

**And take my breath away for the last time.
He was always warm
Like his coffee colored skin
His smiled hugged you
Brought you into submission
Until your bones wrapped under his
I'd play with the outlines of his anatomy
The way his muscles protruded
And relaxed when my fingers traced his
His laugh echoed like violins
Symphonies playing wildly in my ears
And when I'd undress
He'd always stare
Singing how he won a master piece
That was only his
And no one else's to share
The summer heat burned us
Yet only the summer knew
The conversations that filled that room
He held a scar on his chest
I'd kiss it everyday to remind him how beautiful pain is.
The way his hair curled
And felt like silk when I'd run through it
The way I'd look down and kiss him
The world stopped
But so did the day he left
And like a VCR
I hit replay
A memory so vivid
Yet fading each and everyday
-
-
I love you
for who you truly are
I love you
for you are worthy of love
I love you
for you are always there for me
I love you
even if we believe in different Gods
I love you
even if it hurts sometimes
I love you
I love you
I love you
and you are so aware of it
I love you
and you love me too
I love you
but we can't be together

– billiondays
:(
A disruption in a peaceful world, everyday I’m
At war and battling against myself.
Clouds overcast my mind. Ugh, god,
dad, I’m so sorry I’m like this.

Edge is near, I think I’m losing my balance. I
feel like I’m alone in this world.
Guilt consumes my mind. I don’t know
How to not feel like this.

Innocence has disappeared, this is a
jigsaw puzzle I simply can’t solve.
Keep me close, keep me alive.
Landfill of thoughts piling up in my mind.

Missing a piece to the puzzle of life.
No one understands why I’m like this, not even me.
Once I wasn’t this crazy,
Please don’t leave me here alone.

Quick, I feel myself falling apart.
Raging war in my mind, when will it end?
Still searching for the piece that completes the puzzle.
Tick, tick...time's running out.

Underneath this craziness is a person needing to be loved.
Visions of something better, it wasn’t supposed to be like this. It’s
warmth I crave, I need a hand to hold. Looking at an
X-ray of this broken thing that can never be put back together.

Yes, I’m still here. My sanity may not be but I am.
Zigzagging.
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