I want him.
I want his beautiful blue eyes, blazing with desire and love
his soft, full lips, tracing my entire body and taking my own lips as prisoners of war
kissing me, kissing him with everything we've got,
everything we've kept in, pouring out in this kiss
I want to trace his face with my fingertips,
from his short blonde hair gripped in my tiny hands
to his smooth cheeks and his strong jawline and cup his face in my hands
planting lovemarks on his muscular neck in a shape of a circle; our never ending sign of love
I want to whisper sweet nothings and love poems into the curves of his shoulder;
the place where his shoulder and neck meets and that little soft spot,
near his collarbone
I want to outline his chest with words of forever with my hands
sketching an imaginary pattern of hope, want and passion
taking his callused hands in my soft, velvety one
embedding little butterfly kisses in his palms,
just little shadows of them, quick and gentle,
lightly brushing my lips against his lovely hands
I want his entire self,
giving up all of me to him and him, all to me
hushed words of sweet pleasure escaping from our mouths
like little wisps of smoke, trailing over our bodies that move in perfect harmony
I want his everything,
I want nights spent under the Michigan stars, cuddling against each other
talking about all the randomness in the universe
I want to fall asleep to his steady heartbeat with blankets as our only armour
after giving myself to him, a gift of true love to which I will never regret
I want forever and eternity with him, growing up and getting married
having little blonde kids, watching them run around the house and us laughing at all their silliness
and growing old with him, looking at him each and everyday
with the ever present butterflies in my stomach
doing somersaults and flips off the high dive every time I see him,
even after 50 years together
I want to hold him on his death bed, or he holding me when my time comes
I want us to have our small eternity just like Hazel and Augustus
and our almost happy ever after because even though nothing is perfect,
our ending will be the closest to perfection as possible
I want him forever and always,
just him,
only him,
from now to eternity.

their cruel words engraved on her skin,
forget about her, it's the evil within.
the evil that haunts her, that makes her afraid
of life and living, as she turns to the blade.
she makes the first incision, she makes the first cut
she feels the blood pour and keeps her eyes shut.
poor little girl, she's dead on the floor
she can't feel pain or anything no more.
she goes to a place so pretty and white
another girl was taken tonight.
we blame ourselves, we blame each other
we apologise one after another
we say say nice words, we say our respects
but why say it now? now that she's dead?
we could of said it before, before she bled.
but we were too blind, too blind to see
that someone is suffering, suffering in silence
living a life of self harm and violence
a life of hurt, a life of pain
but now that she's dead, we start to complain
how society treated her and that society's to blame
but we are products of society itself
we just ignored it and nobody helped
nobody cared, in fact no one knew
that a girl like this could never pull through
the demons they killed her, they made her like this
something that society would always dismiss.

I look back to this path of
words and lines and
unfinished works and all I can see is
sadness and heartbreak

it's an odd revelation,
realizing all you've ever
felt strongly enough to write about
was love and pain

there's so many other feelings in the world
so many other stories
but the only ones I can tell
are the ones that have made me want to die in the end

if that isn't sad
I'm not sure what is.

I'm not able to sleep and the memories don't go,
My mind invaded by the thoughts I don't want to know.

Like a coward I want to be away ,
But then who'll remind you of the things I want to say?

Confused in the mid way,
Lonely and shattered..my heart says, "You deserve better!"

Yes, I'll move on,
With a smile and the memories that we've left behind.

I'll not stop because I'm a fighter.

A fighter who never gives up even when loses every time.

I have been told
That I have to learn how to smile
Because I have been using it in the wrong way
I thought it was to tell people you are okay
Even if you aren't
Apparently it is to show people
You are happy