Here is a letter
Because my hand moves
More smoothly and fluid
Than my tongue and my
Blood rolls down my finger-
Tips painting pages better
Than words roll past my lips
To speak poetry so...
One. I'm sorry i hurt you
You let me into the darkest
Parts of you and I, like a child
Holding a bucket of paint
In a white room, ruined you
I'm sorry.
Two. You forgave me.
Thank you.
You wiped clean every streak
Of pain i drew on your walls
and yes, i left some stains
But you are beautiful still.
You always have been.
Three. You love me, and I
Love you.
I do not believe love is magic
Love is patient as you are with
Me and it is quiet
Like i am with you and love
Love is human.
It lives and dies
And i hope it dies with me
Four. You will lose me
One last time. Before the end
I will hurt you and everyone
I hold dear. One last time.
Five. I will never tire of seeing
Your face. It will keep me sane
In our years apart.
And six. I will wait. Here where
Its calmer. I will wait for when
Your hair grays and teeth yellow
And when your memory shifts
Like sand and you forget us
I will wait. And when you finally
See me here
Seven. I will listen to every story
You had since i left and i will hear
About every single morning you
Spent with another and i will
Eight. I will tell you i love you. For
The first time since i left i will tell
You again, i love you. Fresh
Off my tongue like the first time
I uttered those three words
I love you.

I'll be honest with you, Friend.
I kind of want to ******* die.
Close my eyes and disappear.
No more problems to worry about.
No more anything.
Ever.
Remember,
Closed eyes don't sigh.
So, even though I care about you,
And I don't want you to feel hurt,
I can't stay here anymore.
You see,
Closed eyes don't sigh.
So with slightly parted lips,
And a smile to make you wonder why,
I'll leave you with these words,
I love you and good bye.

40 minutes
Until I can get up and leave
40 minutes
Until class ends
40 minutes
Until I give up
40 minutes
Until I don't have to do anything
40 minutes

Please stop talking to me
Please stop trying to make me feel better
Please stop pretending you care

You know **** well I do not like you
You know **** well you are the one making me upset
You know **** well you do not care about me

Stop acting like you are trying to help me
Stop touching me
Stop pretending you like me

We both know you do not want to help me
We both know you you only touch me to annoy me
We both know you do not like me

11/11/15
I'm so ******* ******.
I want to smash his face with my fist.
Have a nice ******* day.
Or don't, I don't care anyway.
What's wrong?
Don't we get along?
No, you ******* idiot.
We do not.

Blood is thicker than water
That's what they taught her
But the blood of the covenant is thicker
Her thoughts on life flicker

She couldn't care less what they whisper
It won't change her mind, it won't effect her
But here's the kicker
Thoughts of suicide are always with her

Curiosity killed the cat
She thinks too much of that
But here's a matter of fact
Satisfaction brought her back

Blind as a bat she feels
With a hope she never reveals
But lets not forget
All the things she hides with deep regret

Gild the lily
So, she tells herself to do this truly
But her thoughts they rig
For how can she justify putting lipstick on a pig?

No rest for the wicked
This is not the life she picked
But even with the promise of grace
She knows no peace

She's hidden from view
Even from you
But well behaved women rarely make history
So she'll remain a mystery

One must consider the final result
So, when she leaves it's not your fault
But on brighter thoughts she leans
Because the end justifies the means

I haven't been completely honest
With myself
I lie to her all day long
She asks if I am alright
I nod and give a frail smile
Sure
You could consider me that
I think I would rather give it the name of "surviving"