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Late at night is when I think
And try to I clear my head
I often stay awake all night
Just laying in my bed

As soon as I get comfy
Thoughts start racing in
I start to question everything
and regret my every sin

At first the thoughts are gentle
Like what will I do tomorrow
But as time crawls by; they escalate
Till I'm drowning in my sorrow

I think of all my failures
Every detail of what I did wrong
After hours of reliving pain
I convince myself I don't belong

I suddenly feel isolated
and like the silence will never end
I feel like I will never escape
There's too much I just can't mend

I feel overpowered and worthless
Like I'll never do anything right
I hide till the world fades away
And I'm awoken by the light

I realize a new day has come
It's time to put on a brave face
I put those negative thoughts away
Until I return to this place
 Apr 2018 Triciah Nadine
Styles
some times i feel
like i got ******* on the deal
like democracy, politically
is mocking me, that's how i feel
fake news in times of need
empty promises don't feed
the needy getting left behind
pride getting pushed to the side
empathy and cold hard cash don't coincide
instead of big steps forward
we are falling behind, in a time,
where we, have no time for wasting time
generations of generations getting left behind
after generations of generations, its like genocide
our values dont match our history
told from either side
we should have learned something
instead we just let it ride
playing games with our future
using the hands of time
chasing our heads with tails
its only a matter of times
before we catch up with reality
and it blows our minds
life is so cruel
it makes me look like a fool
i cant survive ... i have no fuel
i cant talk ... always on mute
im hating it ... im no longer cute
even if i am wearing my best suit
no matter how hard i tried to rise
i cant win ! i cant take the prize
and no matter how hard i tried to fly
you'll always find me down cry
 Apr 2018 Triciah Nadine
Sir B
No matter the words i speak of
No matter what i would want

nothing getting accomplished
and nothing's going to be good

its a messed up world
with another messed up person

who can't think right
and cannot differentiate
the wrong from right

No matter the talks i talk about
No matter which scenes i play
cant dream.. so its invalid really

No matter the hymns
or the chimes of birds

No matter the flute melodies
or violin cries

No matter the world

------------------------------------------------------

bu­t worlds the matter
and i am unable to do anything

not able to talk
not able to do nufin!

God.
Nothing works
ughhh

Bad luck
bad luck
bad luck

that's what follows me around

death, suicide
sleep forever

****** my soul already
Have to go to another debate tournament with a senior and he is going to count on me being good and advantageous, because he wants to go to nationals... I, am probably going to be his downfall.

Just have to have hope that i don't break
his dream and another person's
who also counts on me.

just. don't want to be a another cause to a sad ending!
 Apr 2018 Triciah Nadine
apathy
If you wanted to know, how it feels.
It feels like your restrained,
From being happy.
Like your being held back from being okay.

And, honestly,
It's not easy

It's like being sore or in pain,
and not being able to show it,
No matter how much pain your in.

The problem with it is,
the people that seem happiest,
often are the most depressed

That's why its so hard to tell if someones depressed

It's also one of the hardest things to deal with,
The sadness.
The hopelessness.
The numbness.
And yet people still keep a smile on there face.

when it gets so bad.
and people die,
because they cant take it anymore
everyone says "I didn't know it was that bad"
well, they didn't want you to know it was that bad

that's what I hate about depression,
people suffer in silence,
and don't have anyone that supports them,
and when they are gone,
everyone is shocked,
because no one knew they were depressed

So please,
People out there,
don't suffer in silence,
talk to someone,
talk to me,
because I care,

I know how depression feels
and the fake smiles,
and all the "i'm fines"
I know depression ***** ***,
but, please
don't suffer in silence,
because that's what i do,
don't be me,
please
I'm crying for help but silence is what they see
Smiling but the wounds are too deep
Do you see the pain?
Everyone's shoulder... but where's his?
They say he's such a nice kid
Give him an Oscar he earned it
He's putting on a grade A performance
Playing the role but never playing himself
It's a cold world when you're in it by yourself
 Apr 2018 Triciah Nadine
nissa
i am afraid
that my bones will rust
before these buildings do

i am afraid
that my soul will fade
before this ink does

i am afraid
that i will lose my tongue
before the world loses its flavour

i am afraid
you will (not) be there
when the bullet strikes
i am very afraid
 Apr 2018 Triciah Nadine
Xandria
Oh society
Corrupt and disturbed you are
Where did it go wrong
 Apr 2018 Triciah Nadine
Mahdi Dn
Some just draw air in
While some just had their exhale.
Ruins are rebuilt afterwards on a larger scale.
Someone’s dreaming alongside the other one’s nightmare
Just as equations that keep the world structure
Coherent, chromatic, in order by nature;
The source of our presence, here
The core of life on earth

Life is now out of balance,
The order is now rendered differently.
Thriving of man to dominate
The mother-earth, and his blood brothers.
Treacherous man – pinning on God,
All the crimes against nature and his own kind
This is the dawn of a new era
For this world that is filled with dogma

Uncertainty is ruling the minds of men
State of distrust – Political polarity
Only TWO ways they have
By choosing a side, they have to turn their backs
On their own brothers, fighting for a made up act.
Scent of ambiguity is all around the globe
Truth and lie – two sides of a coin

Disunited, and force-fed with these lies
Some realize; some still live these lies.

“Through the history, the earth has never been a witness to such disastrous conditions. Even the dark ages, holy wars, and world wars were not as malignant as present times.”

Evil is the man, bringer of darkness
Scapegoat is Satan
Wicked, yet divine…

-Mahdi "Monstrosity" Dn.
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