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 Apr 2018 Triciah Nadine
ilina286
You know what?
I am tired
Tired from being sad,stupid,ugly
In the last two years
I destroyed my life in every possible way
I was the best in school
Now I'm nothing
I was skinny
Now I'm not
I'm tired of keeping everything in me
Tired of smiling and acting like I'm having a great time
Acting like i dont care about my problems
But keeping so much inside is making me crazy
When i'm alone i burst
I start to cry and i can't stop
My head is hurting me,i cant breath
Feeling so much,but being so numb
Trying to express myself but i dont have any words
Hurting my self,so i can be calm again.
I cant do this anymore.
You call it self-esteem,
But I'm out of steam
To fight this fight
That you call life.

I'm stuck in between ... unseen.

My time to shine?
I don't have time to polish,
To wade through this anguish
That binds me to my anxiety.

Instead, I hide. You are the only one
Who sees me for me;
Yet you don't know how to help me
Become the me I want to be.

Why am I so defensive,
Unable to express myself?
I'm tired ... I'm wired,
I'm all fired up ...

But before I get started,
I find myself guarded.
I weep myself to sleep -
Maybe tomorrow I'll try again.

(March 2012)
I have been programmed
Been tighten with the wires
Cant move and think beyond the limit
I am smiling as no sadness got place

I work, care and love
Dont have choice beside that
I make myself happy
Dont know how to express hurt

Can you please make me feel
That I can cry& share my problems
Can you give me time to feel the love
Want to do the thing you are doing for long

And poor me , he switched me off
Reprogrammed me
And make me robot again
:(  :(
 Apr 2018 Triciah Nadine
D Conors
the hardest part about
writing a poem about you
is that the words tend to
get into the way
of what i really want to
say to
you
D. Conors
03 September 2010
 Apr 2018 Triciah Nadine
Kat
From what I see everyone fits in somewhere
I stare enviously at the people who others who shower them with so much care.
It’s uncomfortable for me to hang out with my middle school “friends” they all have similar interest and have forged something deep.

While I’m over here trying hard just to fit in.
Like in a YouTube video makes by Spechie,
I’m feeling like a snake because my personality is kind of fake.

Of course, this has changed the way I see things.
I’m no longer naive and see things as perfect and pretty like I did in the 6th grade.
When my eyes were forced open my the things my “friends” talked about I felt like my life was a lie.

The people I hang out with they are a little weird.
I’m not weird enough to fit in with this group
But I’m not normal enough to fit in with everyone else.

They all talk about things that concern each other.
While I’m over here talking about things that concern me.
I feel self-centered and conceded.
That’s not what I want not at all but I don’t know what to say.
If I don’t have something to say quickly the topic will change.

Everyone talks about their own experiences
Everyone talks about what they’ve seen
When I do it though I just get stares because I’m not funny
When I talk about me I think that I am self-fish.
I honestly don’t belong anywhere with these people.
I diffidently hang out with certain people.
Some of them I hang out with.
They are really kind
But I don’t fit in with them
And I always feel alone even when people surround me.
I’d like to add a happy ending but it would be lies.
This is something I’m feeling now, any advice?
tbh the grammar is terrible there's too many mistakes to fix
The poem is either a confession or a rifle
It remains deadly regardless

The disorder, the struggle, the heartbreak; the criminal record, the tears, the drugs, the breakdown, the music, the suicide attempt, the riot, the midnight, the fire, the comedown and the uprising

The girl you spent nights awake over, writing poems you knew could never live up, who you were always afraid would ran like hell and never looked back if she ever saw through you,
The night you got arrested, trying to spray paint a manifesto on a red brick wall because you didn't know how else to make them hear you, and you couldn't wipe your own tears through the handcuffs so you had to let your face tell everyone that you weren't as brave as you thought you were,
The boy who died just months after his 18th birthday, who never wanted anything more than to disappear and finally got his wish except in your flashes of memory and dreams of a different life,
The day you first stood in the street with your fists clenched tight around a sign you held high as God and twice as loud, and you felt ignited for the first time in your life like you could burn up everything that held the world down with a Bic lighter and unshakable conviction

So this is where you find me,
Somewhere between the personal and the political,
From the needle in the groove to the back of the squad car
From the drunken night to the show of solidarity
From the "I can't go on anymore" to the "A luta continua"
From the relapse to the rise,
You'll find me in the poem, and I'll be fighting either way
Laying in my bed
endless thoughts swirling around
inside of this mind.
#Haiku
As the sun does rise your life begins.
As you grow older it slowly decends,
and when it sets, your life does end.

— The End —