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Feb 2016 · 463
Hooked
Smily-face-mask Feb 2016
I'm afraid
Fear is my closet friend who stabs me at the back but I still linger.
I'm afraid I'll lose you and get caught up with someone else straying father away from the sun and letting my shadow swallow me whole. It's easy to hold my breath but its harder to stop breathing. So I'll talk to myself as a son and scold me like a sibling, to give up all I can ever get in pursuit of the greater worth.
Notes (optional)
Feb 2016 · 665
Weltanschauung
Smily-face-mask Feb 2016
In a world of brag berrys and eye phones
The desired no longer is the required
And the smiles are  synonymous with the flash and camera.
With a startling contraction of hiding less and wanting more
And lopsided talk that grows airtight, less each week
As the enemy we hunt lie in our beds, we seem more estranged from our sons
Welcome to the iron and concrete maze we call life, with our only reward a starting line
And defiance, a strength I must find
Least I become deficient among my kind

I rise to the surface like a corpse
And my stench filling the morning air
******* the ear but deep to the soul
With one message on my morbid lips
Come die with me!
To all your landlocked dreams
To all your chains shackles and beams
And enjoy the privileges of a dead man
Who has no life to live other than his.
Because in losing I can find
And in ending I can begin again
Notes (optional)
Jan 2016 · 434
Unprepared
Smily-face-mask Jan 2016
You always show up too early
Walking in when the room is still untidy
You come in and find me
Taking them one by one the people I kept afar
The ones I always have good intentions for
But never seem to know how to relate

You were one of them
Always on your feet or knees
Didn't care if you ever did blend
Only the master to please
His flock to tend

It seems the dark saw my game
And played a counter before I could claim
The prize of knowing you past the plains
But if I knew better it wouldn't be another claim
So that when the hand came and out your flame
I would smile and shake my head picturing how it all played
Out, but now all I have is pain

Love the ones you can now
Before they wander too far and can't be found
Then your grief will compound
Because they didn't have any time with you around
RIP AUNTIE JANE
Notes (optional)
Smily-face-mask Dec 2015
Take me back to before now
To before I knew your smile and smell your hair
To that time I saw
To before this tunnel vision
To calm and serenity
To revelry and dirt bikes
Now its the madness
Its eye hazy, mind lazy, heart beating, mouth drying
Stomach churning and hand shaking
I used to be human
Now I'm a either alien or dead.
Though I go in and out like a needle
I want to suture to you for life
And if we must break i want to leave with a piece of your skin
I'll put it in my pocket and smell it when no one's looking
And if you don't want to ever see me, I'll break into your place and tattoo my face on your chest .
I'm insecure. I'm unsure. I have ugly doubts. My scares are  horrifying. I can't stand mirrors. They remind me of the man I was. But if there's anything I have it'll always be in you, in your touch, in the way you take me apart in my thoughts.

Take me to the time when I'll be there in front of you
To hear you call my name and say it like a song
To when riches or lack,
Strength or slack
White gray or black,
Or deaths' crease can't hold us back
Notes (optional)
Nov 2015 · 382
Five shades of fear
Smily-face-mask Nov 2015
Blue
As we sway in our guilt
Red
When the right was wronged
Pale
Our feet pale as we wait
Black
Black smoke rises from a distance
Some embraced the evil within
And helped grow her tentacles
Working for no master slaving for no pay
Dust on the wind. Groping ,stumbling , falling then back again tomorrow.

Sad laughter with a hand full of flies over a still figure.
They never learn! They never learn!!

But we have learnt. Learned not to assume trust
Or even walk in shadows
Bitting or lips to evil and bleaching our tongues from lies
But our hope it's still unsung
White
Notes (optional)
Jun 2015 · 603
When I write
Smily-face-mask Jun 2015
I'm not trying to end my pain
Just bleeding through my pen.
A white page for the dark days,
And a little paper for my wet eyes

My beating heart a kick for this sad song, words burning paper only to be put out by tears

When I write , I tell you a story, of how good will finally take the glory.
Then I'll see a smile crack as you read,
Because you also write to take away your misery
May 2015 · 853
St Jude's Hospital
Smily-face-mask May 2015
There's beauty in owing no man.
With lion arms for tender grips,
You do the things no man can.
With you I yearn for afflictions' lush lips.

To light a spark and watch it go up in flames
Listening to the beating of a frail heart-song
Their only thank you is a grasp of your finger, the butterflies in your heart

Tall against the memphis night, You shine like the star
Your frame strong but eyes as soft as a bubble
A shy smile as clear as the sea
You truly are beautiful!
To the men who keep my dreams alive
May 2015 · 268
Untitled
Smily-face-mask May 2015
Imagine the cool breeze is a hug from  divinity.
The gleam and wide eyes, light in a dark heart.
Rays from the golden ball, a cue for our beings to jive.

Gravity is just a drill that bores the holes for the nails that our hearts hang on and.
Mother why have you hazed your vision and brought to oblivion the obvious.
You sit on the steps to intuition and shut it light out

Never! No! Never again to *****. From the day I got the stinging in my eyes, I rather have them open. Looking through the dark and gazing at the light in them
Apr 2015 · 352
...While we wait
Smily-face-mask Apr 2015
Weak!
All we are is just frail.
With fragments of hope pendulous in thin air.
We are the children of the night, clinging to what people left after dusk.
We're twisting, turning, looking, longing.
Blue eyes over gray hair on white sheets.
Thoughts of home and dreams of rest, of an inside as prodigious as the sea.
We mechanically move to the sound of a different song-the small whisper left unheard.
With the heartbeat for a kick drum and our actions as voices, we will sing while we wait!
Apr 2015 · 462
Transition
Smily-face-mask Apr 2015
We drag our boxes alongside our hopes with sighs as breath,  and thoughts for reality. We all bought it, but do we really want it? Our dry mouths hidden by wry smiles. This is what I want!-we shout back to the voices in our head- We hope,pray even!
I am the beating heart. I'm in this for good! With my hand to the wheels and my eyes on the road 'cause I am the beating heart.

— The End —