it whispers playful musings
it sings songs--
like an old friend--
it sings songs
it muses about the end

it is the dilemma in knowing
that the drink which leaves you
frothing at the mouth
bleeding out the eyes
tastes like the best worst thing
tastes like the most saccharine--

it is the agony in knowing
that to drink it once means
to leave something unsaid
to leave the door open
and the gas on
to leave the static buzzing
and a baby crying
and the faucet running
and someone wondering--

I
Don't
Have
Any,

But I am a good actress.

I am the stranger outside
Watching you in the shower
The monster under your bed
When you're trying to sleep

I am the stalker in the shadows
When you're walking in the street
The fear on the dark corners
You know I'm waiting there

I am the nightmare at night
Those forbidden thoughts in your head
You try to make yourself resist
But you're a prisoner of my will

I am the coming *******
As you fall to your submission
The surrendering to completion
At last, you face exactly who I am

You don't have to buy me things;
You are enough.

I miss you sometimes
But only around bedtime
When my brain can't stop thinking
I wonder why you kept drinking
I wonder how this came about
Who led you down this route?
Who turned you into this
How'd you fall into this bottomless abyss?
How did this fall into my hands?
How did I fall under your command?
I'll continue to miss you
And the days will still feel blue
Knowing there's nothing that I can do